Wednesday's Woe - "Be Kind"

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."

Quote ~Ian Maclaren (pseudonym for John Watson, 1850-1907)

Wednesday's Woe

"Be Kind"

Let's face it, we know that we are fighting a hard battle, Every. Day. And we need the kindness from one another as we struggle on. Our LORD reminds us of this too, as well as guiding us as to how best to fight through our battles. 

The graphic above says it well, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." However, I believe we have wrongly attributed the saying to Plato. Wikipedia attributes the quote to Reverend John Watson (1850-1907), a Scottish author and theologian who used the pseudonym "Ian Maclaren":

"It is thought that Maclaren was the original source of the quotation “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle,” now widely misattributed to Plato or Philo of Alexandria. The oldest known instance of this quotation is in the 1897 Christmas edition ofThe British Weekly: 

“Be pitiful (e.g., full of pity, or tender/kind), for every man is fighting a hard battle."

Wikipedia's assessment rings true for me as the quote does not seem to resonate with the language of the times of Plato. 

The essence of the quote, however, is elucidated best I believe in the following quote from Reverend John Watson himself:

"This man beside us also has a hard fight with an unfavouring world, with strong temptations, with doubts and fears, with wounds of the past which have skinned over, but which smart when they are touched. It is a fact, however surprising. 

And when this occurs to us we are moved to deal kindly with him, to bid him be of good cheer, to let him understand that we are also fighting a battle; we are bound not to irritate him, nor press hardly upon him nor help his lower self."

Amen! May we all be as kind as we possibly can to one another!

On the evening of Mother's Day, Tommy and I watched a movie (foreign, with subtitles) that had been nominated for an Academy Award. It was a very difficult movie to watch in that it included much of the worst of human nature, but then again Tommy always reminds me, we forget that the Bible is full of horrendous human acts played out in the midst of families... 

This movie was one of those tragic stories that challenge you to the pit of your gut, heart, and soul, it is so humanly painful. But, oh my, the lessons it holds for us... 

The movie is aptly entitled, "Incendiaries," but as hard as it was to watch, I can honestly say, for me it was life-changing, reminding me to ever bear in mind every human walking the face of this earth has his/her battles, most of which we would never know just from superficial contact. God really used it in my heart and soul as I was moved to compassion in deeper ways.... I can honestly say, a movie that I watched in fear and trepidation was one of the best Mother's Day presents I ever could have received.

Our LORD sends a similar message as Maclaren's through His apostle Paul in Ephesians, when He reminds us, "our struggle is not against flesh and blood…" and calls us to pray for all of His people as we all all struggle in this world…

"10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.  

"14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 

"18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. 19 Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, 20 for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should."

~Ephesians 6:10-20 NIV (highlights and some capitalization, mine)

We are reminded in the Scripture we likely all memorized as a little child:

"Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."

~Ephesians 4:32 NASB

And this,

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

~Ephesians 4:29 NIV

May our LORD continue to help us as we struggle daily with our deep grief-and-trauma along with all the other difficulties we and many others face as we walk through this fallen world!

~Blessings to each of you~

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ian_Maclaren 

Tuesday's Trust - The Grace Card ~Tommy and Angie Prince

Tuesday's Trust

The Grace Card

~Tommy and Angie Prince

Tonight, Tommy and I watched a movie... about what you ask? Just ask our two sons -- What do we do to take a break away from our grief and trauma? You probably guessed it ~ we watch a movie about grief or trauma!

We entered into watching this movie tonight with fear and trepidation as we've watched our share of "somewhat hoaky" to "pretty hoaky" movies about grief. We all know it is pretty hard to show what a child-loss parent's grief looks like...

And here comes this dvd that is made up of mostly volunteers... {We don't mind that of course ~ our nephew was an actor volunteer in "We Are Marshall" (he was the kicker on the football team), and our own son Rollin recently has been cast in one of these types of movies, one called "Laughing at the Moon," but this movie has not yet been released. (I'm sure you'll hear more about that later!)}

We were teasing each other before watching this particular grief movie, called "The Grace Card" by saying:

"We'll give it ten minutes...!"

We seem to have this need to check out all the movies we can about child-loss. 

Another movie we recently checked out was, "The Other Woman" ~ another movie about child-loss. Though it had a famous actress (Natalie Portman) starring in it, it seemed to fall flat to us. But then our standards are pretty high about whether people can "capture" such a grief as the one we are living out day by day, hour by grief-struck hour.

In the movie tonight, "The Grace Card," fortunately we were pleasantly surprised (if you can be pleasantly surprised about grief). The "grieving family" members were continuing to show the pain and struggle that I'm sure can still be with you after 17 years of grieving, complete with the toll such grief takes upon every family member, each feeling grief's pain and chaos in their own unique way. The main character, the "father" in particular (who is a Christian stand-up comedian by trade) did an excellent job of portraying the angst of a child-loss father: with the soul-searching questions, the guilt, the isolating oneself from others who don't or can't "get it," the power of life-stopping triggering moments, the guilt, the anger, the repulsion over "God-talk" when it is plastic, cliche, cheesy, or a quick cop-out versus the authentic experience of God that can be loving, comforting, challenging, growth-producing, and life-transforming. 

How many of us secretly harbor that self-blame still? How many of us feel the continued raw anger and wonder where is this coming from, and is this perhaps the start of bitterness, or is the anger mere self-protection needed to survive another day? This movie showed a simple but powerful concept of grace ~ grace toward others, and grace toward yourself amidst such grief. 

This movie seems to stand alone in showing the transcending quality that the spiritual component can bring to one's grief. The movie aptly captured both the angst of child-loss, but also the redemptive component that can come in child-loss as you learn to extend grace to yourself (and others) amidst your pain. 

And "The Grace Card" didn't show this redemptive quality in a cheap way, but in an authentic-enough way that we were right in the pain with the parent. And we were right there in the grace with him too. 

This movie is one that seemed to come close to capturing some of the real agony of a child-loss griever, and that of the other child-loss family members. And yet, it also presented a fairly authentic portrait of the grace that we trust is also an important aspect of our healing as God, by His tender mercy, enables us to learn ways to transcend our terrible angst and pain.

Picture, thanks to Amazon.com