Sunday's Sorrow ~ Good Mourning!

Sunday's Sorrow

Good Mourning!

Good Morning!

(Welcome again to my world of sadness.)

Or shall I say, "Good Mourning!"

As I celebrate my child who brought me gladness...

Tears flow~

As I remember my child's and my love for one another…

Must they slow?

No! Such is the life of a Grieving Mother!

Good Mourning!

Do not let the world tell you your tears are bad ~

Our tears are simply God's reminder of what we had ~

Good Mourning!

Every grieving mother knows

Cherishing our child's love is worth being sad!

Good Mourning!

So until we reach Heaven, our tears must flow!

The tears that represent our sacred treasure,

others ~who are blind~ will call "fools gold"!

Good Mourning!

As our Lord said, "Blessed are those who mourn" ~

We, of all people then, are blessed beyond measure!

Good Mourning!

Poem - Good Mourning! - Angie Bennett Prince - April 2, 2016

~~~~~

Grief is not a disease;

it is not an illness;

it is not depression.

It is, in fact,

an expression

of love.

Grief can only 

be a disease

if love is.

~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, 

fellow psychotherapist and grieving mother

Thursday's Therapy - Dr. Cacciatore's Guide to Self-Compassion ~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, Psychologist and Grieving Mother

Thursday's Therapy

Dr. Cacciatore's Guide to Self-Compassion

~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, Psychologist and Grieving Mother

Dr. Cacciatore's Guide to Self-Compassion

 1. Spend at least fifteen to thirty minutes daily in meditation, prayer or quiet time just being.

 2. Commit at least twenty minutes a day to exercise- yoga, walking, or any type of exercise within your abilities.

 3. When you are able, try to laugh at least once a day.

 4. Surround yourself with caring others- family, friends, and/or colleagues. Seek the company of others who are compassionate, open hearted, and kind.

5. Get 15-20 minutes of sunshine each day.

 6. Observe and experience nature. Notice the sky when walking to your car. Listen to the sounds of birds. Pay attention to the trees, smell blossoming flowers, hear the buzzing ees, and watch ants as they work. Get out into nature as often as you can.

 7. Experience gratitude daily, even for simple things in life that we usually take for granted such as clean running water, shelter, & food. 

 8. Notice negative self-talk and love yourself through them when you can.

 9. Show compassion, actively, toward others. Look for, even small, opportunities to help. Open doors, offer to aid someone carrying groceries, really listen to someone else's story. Actively seek to give kindness, and volunteer at least one day per month.

10. Support your brain: Eat a healthy diet and eliminate junk foods. Take a good, food based multi-vitamin/mineral and include omega oils.

11. Express your feelings and affection for your loved ones. Take the time to tell them how much they mean to you. Give, and accept praise.

12. Try to experience connectedness to others. To your beloved dead. To neighbors. To family. To the sky and earth. Pay attention to feelings of disconnection and strive toward feelings and actions which promote connection.

13. Seek rituals that help you remember your loved ones who have died.

14. Change your routine in small ways. Change the way you dress one day; take a new route to work; find a novel hobby; read a new book; wear a new scent; eat a new food.

15. Give yourself permission to experience self-compassion & self-love. Be gentle with you. Practice forgiveness - especially to your self, and be your own best friend.

Thanks to ~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, Facebook

Thursday's Therapy - "The Death of Grief, the Birth of Mental Illness" ~Joanne Cacciatore, PhD, LMSW, FT

Thursday's Therapy

"The Death of Grief, the Birth of Mental Illness"

~Joanne Cacciatore, PhD, LMSW, FT

Grief is not disease.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 3, 2012

The Death of Grief, the Birth of Mental Illness

For immediate release December 4, 2012

Dear MISS Foundation families, providers, and supporters,

We are saddened and disappointed by the recent announcement that the DSM-5 task force has finalized the decision to eliminate the bereavement exclusion from the Major Depressive Disorder diagnosis in the upcoming edition of the manual. This move will allow clinicians, including counselors, general physicians, social workers, and psychiatrists, to diagnose a major mental disorder in bereaved parents and other grieving individuals as early as two weeks following the death of a loved one should they meet the DSM-5’s criteria for depression. Importantly, many of you will recognize these criteria which include sadness, feelings of emptiness, crying, sleep and weight changes, guilt and regrets, and loss of interest or energy. Yet, all of these symptoms are quite common in grief, and particularly after the death of a baby or child which evokes enduring and intense reactions in parents.

This move has personal implications for the MISS Foundation. The DSM-5 change increases the likelihood that grief will be misdiagnosed as Major Depressive Disorder in the most vulnerable of all populations.¹ The possibility exists that bereaved parents and other grievers will be mistakenly treated for a misdiagnosed mental disorder. Recent trends suggest that the most common form of treatment offered for this disorder is psychotropic medication.^2-3 While some medications may be effective for some forms of depression,⁴ there is no sound evidence that they are effective for grief. Research shows that bereaved parents are already medicated earlier than can be justified by current evidence.^5-6 We fear the DSM-5 change will exacerbate this trend and cause even more grieving individuals to be prescribed medication for symptoms which are actually a normative response, despite the lack of evidence to support this practice and a lack of information on how such medications may interfere with the grieving process.

The MISS Foundation has actively opposed this proposed change in DSM-5 and will continue to do so. You can read Dr. Joanne Cacciatore’s initial blog post which went viral in March of 2012 on this topic here.  The first open letter outlining our concerns sent to the American Psychiatric Association in March can be read here and another letter sent in April can be found here. Finally, in October the MISS Foundation issued a formal letter on behalf of the organization and can be viewed here. Finally, many links to research and articles about this issue can be found in this blog entry at the end.

We issue a caution to our families: We urge bereaved individuals to be informed about what this change could mean when seeking help from medical and mental health providers using DSM-5, scheduled to be published next year. Should you have concerns about the quality of medical/mental/emotional care you are being provided, please speak with experts who can help guide you. Get help somewhere, indeed.

Please be assured that many other parents are experiencing the same immense suffering and that you are not alone. Seek solace through skilled and highly trained providers who truly care for you and are willing to walk with you through your darkest times: providers who understand the death of a child as life’s worst tragedy and who will be truly present with and available to you. Seek solace through like others in support groups, online support, and through your community.  Seek solace in spirituality and nature and books that help you to cope as you travel this overwhelming road. Seek solace through self-care and compassion. Seek solace through others who are unconditionally loving whether that be your partner, family, children, animals, or your faith based community. Seek solace through contemplative practice such as prayer, meditation, and quiet time and also through action in service and kindnesstoward others.

We issue an ardent appeal to providers: The bereaved are a vulnerable population. Please, be mindful and conservative in the issuance of diagnoses and medication, and educate yourselves in evidence-based practices as well as culturally influenced interventions. Take personal responsibility to learn what is truly normal, not pathological, after a traumatic death. The DSM-5 gives you much power and influence over the life of another. Please do not take this responsibility to “do no harm” lightly.

Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, Founder                                           Kara Thieleman, MSW, PhD Student         

Karla Helbert, LPC, Facilitator                                              Dr. Melissa Flint, Clinical Psychologist                    

Jennifer Soos, MFT, Facilitator                                             Dr. Trish Wonch Hill, Policy Analyst

Barry Kluger, CEO                                                                 Kelli Montgomery, Executive Director

Yasaman Parsi, Grief Counselor                                          Rebecca Ong, MSW, Grief Counselor

References

1. Wakefield, J. C., & First, M. B. (2012). Validity of the bereavement exclusion to major depression: Does the empirical evidence support the proposal to eliminate the exclusion in DSM-5? World Psychiatry, 11(1), 3-10. doi:10.1016/j.wpsyc.2012.01.002

2. Mojtabai, R., & Olfson, M. (2008). National trends in psychotherapy by office-based psychiatrists. Archives of General Psychiatry, 65(8), 962-970. doi:10.1001/archpsyc.65.8.962

3. Olfson, M., & Marcus, S. C. (2010). National trends in outpatient psychotherapy. American Journal of Psychiatry, 167(2), 1456-1463. doi:10.1176/appi.ajp.2010.10040570

4. Kirsch I., Moore, T. J., Scoboria, A., & Nicholls, S. S. (2002). The emperor’s new drugs: An analysis of antidepressant medication data submitted to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. Prevention & Treatment, 5(1), 23a. doi:10.1037/1522-3736.5.1.523a

5. Cacciatore, J., Lacasse, J. R., Lietz, C., & McPherson, J. (In press). A parent’s TEARS: Primary results from the Traumatic Experiences and Resiliency Study. OMEGA.

6. Cacciatore, J., & Thieleman, K. (2012). Pharmacological treatment following traumatic bereavement: A case series. Journal of Loss and Trauma, 17(6), 557-579. doi:10.1080/15325024.2012.688699

Link to this article here. Please share far and wide with others.

Article: http://drjoanne.blogspot.com/2012/12/the-death-of-sadness-birth-of-mental.html
Also, please note the comments and responses underneath Dr. Joanne's article, as these are also enlightening.