Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Thursday's Therapy - Undone… by Traumatic Grief - 9 Descriptors of What Can Bring on Traumatic Grief Reactions ~Tommy and Angie Prince with H. Norman Wright

Thursday's Therapy
Undone… by Traumatic Grief
9 Descriptors of What Can Bring on Traumatic Grief Reactions

~Tommy and Angie Prince

with H. Norman Wright, Grief & Trauma Therapist

Tommy and I have always maintained Child-Loss Grief is not just about the grief, but it is primarily about the trauma. Yes, we miss our child, and our world will never be the same, but somehow we always thought we would be able to trust our bodies to be there for us, our spirituality to always be secure -- especially when we most need it, our minds to be mentally stable, our trust in God to be secure, our relationship with one another to be stable--especially in a crisis, our peace of mind to be present when everything around us may be falling apart. We, after all, were trained to deal with crisis. To lose all sense of judgment when a client is in crisis would be disastrous for all… 

But here we are in the crisis, and instead of thinking sanely, we have to question our own judgment, our own ability to think clearly enough to make wise decisions, our own stability when all alarms are going off inside as if disaster were around every corner. As if the loss of our child were not enough, we have had all our props knocked out from under us -- and that, when we most need them! 

Our family members and friends on whom we could always count, desert us from their own insecurities and fears of death. Our churches are exposed to be more about the programs we are expected to attend than to be about the tremendous love of God that can carry us through all, and we cannot bear such true message of God's character being blurred by any non-necessities at a time when everything about us is thrown into major crisis. 

Our health can be accosted. Our bodies are so steeped in grief that they cannot take in all the cues around us so that we become uncharacteristically accident prone. Our jobs can become albatrosses around our neck instead of the secure rhythms of life they have always been, for our job now --our main job-- is our grief and trauma that we need every focus we have available to be able to navigate the extremely rugged terrain on which we find ourselves. Our sleep is wrecked to where we have nightmares or insomnia such that we aren't even rested when we face the next day when we must again navigate and tread through the hazardous, yet slow-as-molasses terrain for another day. Our world-as-we-knew it seems to be crumbling down all around us, and this at a time when everyone in our "support" system thinks we should surely be doing well by now shouldn't we?!

We have always contended that in Child-Loss, we have not only the world's worst grief to deal with, but added to that the most unexpected, continuous serving of trauma we ever would have expected to have to cope with!

As Norm Wright, a Christian psychotherapist specializing in grief, and also a child-loss parent, says in his book, Helping Those in Grief:

Traumatic grief lengthens and multiplies every aspect of the grief process.  Traumatic grief is a direct response to disastrous events that threaten safety, security and beliefs around which we structure and order our lives. It can happen directly to the person or to a family member.

Certain events are more likely to precipitate traumatic grief reactions and share some uncommon themes. Here is a list of descriptors that identify what can bring on Traumatic Grief Reactions:

  • Unexpected--The surprise elements stun and shock. We feel dazed and disoriented. 
  • Uncontrollable--The event is beyond our abilities to change it. We feel powerless and vulnerable.
  • Unimaginable--The horrific elements are not familiar to our way of life. Our frame of reference does not include what we are witnessing. We feel appalled and horrified.
  • Unreal--The event is too strange to process. We see but do not comprehend what we are seeing. We feel confused and disoriented.
  • Unfair--We feel like victims who have done nothing to deserve this tragedy. We feel hurt, puzzled, angry or fearful.
  • Unforgivable--We need to blame someone or something. What do we do with our anger, rage and urge to punish? We feel powerless. 
  • Unprecedented--Nothing like this has happened before. We don't have a script to follow. We feel directionless.
  • Unprepared--We haven't perceived a reason to ready ourselves for an unimaginable catastrophe. Our defense mechanisms may be inadequate to handle the demand. We feel overwhelmed.
  • Uncertainty--We don't fully know the long-range effect on ourselves, our families, our jobs, our future and the future of our offspring. We feel ambivalent and torn between hope and fear.

Picture, thanks to Barbara Kerrer, Grieving Mothers

Wednesday's Woe - How Could We Have Been So Wrong?

Wednesday's Woe

How Could We Have Been So Wrong?

~Tommy and Angie Prince

Grieving mother, "Mama Pundit" (whose picture I used in Tuesday's post) wrote a book about raising a child with attachment bonding. She loved and she lost...

Tommy and I believed in conscientious parenting also. We alternated days at the office so that one of us could always be home with our children. We eventually moved our office to our house so that both of us could be more available to our children.  

We raised our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. We raised them in church, at times even in our own "home church" when churches got away from what was important about God. Our children's teen years were invested in a youth group that believed in truly discipling one another to grow closer to God, and closer to God did each of them grow! Each of our children had a tender heart toward God, and toward loving others regardless of color, class, or creed. 

Each of our children had a healthy sense of humor and were surrounded by friends who loved to laugh at them and their antics. They were all outgoing, and tended to reach out to those who weren't always included. 

They each were dedicated athletes, embracing the disciplines of hard work and much sweat.  

Our bonds with each child were strong and wholesome. Despite natural growing pains, we were all very real with one another. We truly loved one another, and freely shared that, with words, with affection, and with actions.  

The unbearable truth of it all is that you can do everything right, and things still can go so wrong...

Picture from Shinnston tornado

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Tuesday's Trust - Telling Our Story: Our Truth versus Their Denial

Tuesday's Trust

Telling Our Story: 

Our Truth versus Their Denial

How is it we face Death's reality
When others march illusively along,
And yet when we face our mortality,
By admitting our weakness, we are strong?

In a single blow, Death shattered our illusions,
For we abruptly learned a child could die,
But others still cling to their delusions
And beg us ~ by their denial ~ to lie:

"Tell us you've not been thrown in Hell's pit,
Daily grieving the loss of your child;
Buck up! Cheer up! For I cannot bear it!
Your broken heart makes me see Satan's wiles…
It unleashes upon me some hell on earth
To see a mother can be parted from her child
When with empty arms, she questions her worth
And cannot function in this world for such a long while."

But we ~ we who by Death have been vilely robbed…
Cling to our truth ~ "Yes! Our child has died,
Wrenching our hearts till we sob and sob.
 Our LOVE is too large to succumb to your lie;
We can no longer 'play pretend'
When life as we knew it has come to an end!"

And yet I observe a transformation
As we daily face the Truth that stopped our life:
Our tears call down Comfort ~God's restoration~
Love carries us in our grief as with Death we strive.

Love embraces the love in this mother's heart;
His tears with mine start to co-mingle.
For love of my child, He did His own part:
He gave up His child, His single Son
Which unleashed enough of His tears to fill the River of Life
Empowering His Child and mine to end death's strife,
Both restored to His arms to live their everlasting life!

Embracing such Truth sets this mother free
Despite the fact that I still shed many-a-tear;
Love's comfort empow'rs me to live my life here,
While Love's death paved a way for my child and me
To live together with Love for all eternity!

Picture, thanks to Grieving Mother, K.G.
Poem - Telling Our Story: Our Truth versus Their Denial - Angie Bennett Prince - 5/28/2012

Sunday, May 27, 2012

~Blessed Memorial Day~ Monday's Mourning Ministry - Temporary Home ~Carrie Underwood

"In Remembrance Of All Who Gave Their Lives Defending Our Freedom & The Freedom Of Others ~Memorial Day 2012 ~ FREEDOM ISN'T FREE ~ HONOR OUR HEROES"

May you all have a Blessed Memorial Day!

A precious client shared this song by Carrie Underwood with me a few days ago. When I listened to Carrie's song, "Temporary Home," it was so poignant, it brought tears to my eyes. I thought you might "enjoy" it too!

~Blessed Memorial Day~
Monday's Mourning Ministry
Temporary Home
~Carrie Underwood

Little boy, six years old
A little too used to being alone
Another new mom and dad
Another school, another house that will never be home
When people ask him how he likes this place
He looks up and says with a smile upon his face

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I'm passing through
This is just a stop on the way to where I'm going
I'm not afraid because I know
This is my temporary home

Young mom, on her own
She needs a little help, got nowhere to go
She's looking for a job, looking for a way out
'Cause a halfway house will never be a home
At night she whispers to her baby girl
"Someday we'll find our place here in this world"

This is our temporary home, it's not where we belong
Windows and rooms that we're passing through
This is just a stop on the way to where we're going
I'm not afraid because I know
This is our temporary home

Old man, hospital bed
The room is filled with people he loves
And he whispers
"Don't cry for me, I'll see you all someday"
He looks up and says
"I can see God's face"

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I'm passing through
This was just a stop on the way to where I'm going
I'm not afraid because I know
This was my temporary home

This is our temporary home

Saturday's Sayings - Love is Eternal

Saturday's Sayings

Love is Eternal


Love never disappears for death is a non-event. 
I have merely retired to the room next door. 
You and I are the same; what we were for each other, we still are.
Speak to me as you always have. 
Do not use a different tone, do not be sad. 
Continue to laugh at what made us laugh. 
Smile and think of me. 
Life means what it has always meant. 
The link is not severed. 
Why should I be out of your soul if I am out of your sight? 
I will wait for you; I am not here, but just on the other side of this path. 
You see, all is well. 

~ St. Augustine

~via Grieving Mothers


You know, I sat up night after night with my child, carried him a (sic) many miles. Took him for his shots and school was his favorite place where he met friends. I went to meetings, even faced up against the DCS and COG home for children to get him home from a camp ...[I ] put him in ...and to come home and, paid his ticket fines and cell phone bills, and took him shopping for clothes because a friend stole his clothes…bought another cell phone, because a friend stepped on it. 
It was more than being a mother, more than being his friend, and grandmother to his child…or children. It was part of my heart and soul. I brought him up in church and taught him well. We don't choose what our children do, we are just there for them. 
I gave up millions to BE there and then, He's Gone …and I am at loss of everything that I invested my life in. Want to scream his name, but he doesn't answer …so I pray that God gets a message to him, telling him, I loved him with all my heart and soul and mind and am sorry for not being there in the end.

~via S.F., Grieving Mother
~picture, via K.G., Grieving Mother


I have not turned my back on you
So there is no need to cry.
I'm watching you from heaven
Just beyond the morning sky. 

I've seen you almost fall apart
When you could barely stand.
I asked an angel to comfort you
And watched her take your hand. 
She told me you are in more pain
Than I could ever be.
She wiped her eyes and swallowed hard
Then gave your hand to me. 
Although you may not feel my touch
Or see me by your side.
I've whispered that I love you
While I wiped each tear you cried. 

So please try not to ache for me
We'll meet again one day.
Beyond the dark and stormy sky
A rainbow lights the way. 

~via Grieving Mothers


'The Ache Never Goes Away'

Grieving husband and father, Joe Biden, speaks to grieving parents and spouses of the fallen soldiers...
Vice President Joe Biden in a moving and emotional speech to the families of fallen troops recounted the dark painful days following the tragic deaths of his wife and daughter and talked about thoughts of suicide. 

If you have trouble viewing the video here, please cut and paste the following address into your address bar and hit enter:


Look for me in Rainbows

Time for me to go now, I won't say goodbye; 
Look for me in rainbows, way up in the sky. 
In the morning sunrise when all the world is new, 
Just look for me and love me, as you know I loved you. 

Time for me to leave you, I won't say goodbye; 
Look for me in rainbows, high up in the sky. 
In the evening sunset, when all the world is through, 
Just look for me and love me, and I'll be close to you. 

It won't be forever, the day will come and then 
My loving arms will hold you, when we meet again. 
Time for us to part now, we won't say goodbye; 
Look for me in rainbows, shining in the sky. 

Every waking moment, and all your whole life through 
Just look for me and love me, as you know I loved you. 
Just wish me to be near you, 
And I'll be there with you.

~Via J.C., Grieving Mother


~via V.W.D., Grieving Mother


When all was quiet 
And we were sad 
Thinking of the 
Times we'd had 

A butterfly 
Then came to us 
Flew around 
Without a rush 

Showed us how 
He'd been set free 
Drifting off 
Where we can't see 

Helped us know 
He's on his way 
We'll treasure this 
Each passing day. 

~Sharon Kortas 

~via Grieving Mothers


~thanks to J.C., Grieving Mother


~via J.C., Grieving Mother

Thanks for all Grieving Parents who share such wonderful thoughts, sayings, and pictures...

Friday, May 25, 2012

Friday's Faith - Strength…by Faith…

Friday's Faith
Strength…by Faith…

… those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

~Isaiah 40:31

I awakened one morning this week (as I do many mornings these days), feeling completely exhausted before the day even started, but on this day especially so. (Ain't insomnia great?!) 

On top of a heavy-duty client-load this week, I was also to return the call of an attorney who may possibly need me to testify on a client's case in court this week. I prayed to the Lord, 

"God, You know how exhausted I am; there is NO way I can add traveling out of town to appear in a hotly contested court case, and do the testimony any justice in the exhausted state that I am in."

I prayed that He would either release me from the case, or have my energies restored by Him. I also prayed He would let His will be known and done in my life, and that if He wanted me to testify, reminded Him I could only do so by His strength

Later in the day as I was talking to the attorney who said he would definitely need me in court the next day, I began to notice that my energy had surged. 

I found that I not only felt strong enough to "do battle"; I actually felt strengthened and energized and found myself raring to "do battle"! 

The following day, Tommy and I drove to the out of town justice center, and sat down in the packed courtroom. We looked around in wonderment at all the uniformed officers bedecked with bullet-proof vests atop their uniforms and noted this was definitely not "traffic court" we were witnessing. (We later discovered Tommy was sitting right next to an alleged murder suspect!) 

My client leaned over and thanked me for coming, and I laughed and leaned over to her and whispered, 

"I live for days like this!"  

{As one of my former supervisors always said, "I am a human first, an advocate second, and a therapist third."} 

Later, I gave my testimony before the judge, and was questioned by both opposing sides of the court. As I answered, I surprised even myself with the strength behind my words. 

God came through in flying colors as He enabled me to fight hard for my client through my words. 

God indeed does work in mysterious ways, His wonders to perform! I am so thankful I was able to rise to the occasion with the help of my wonderful Lord, Himself our ever faithful Advocate!

New Living Translation (©2007)
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you.

~John 14:16

New Living Translation (©2007) 
My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an Advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the One who is truly righteous.

~I John 2:1
Some scripture capitalizations, mine

Picture and first Scripture, thanks to Daily Scripture eCard
Scriptures, New Living Translation of The Holy Bible, 2007

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Thursday's Therapy - ReConceiving Preconceived Notions About Grief ~Thomas M. Ellis

Thursday's Therapy

ReConceiving Preconceived Notions About Grief

~Thomas M. Ellis

Thomas M. Ellis is a therapist, clinical supervisor, and executive director of the Center for Grief, Loss, and Transition based in Saint Paul, Minnesota:

Death, loss, and grief are realities of life. But few of us feel comfortable openly conversing about these critical life experiences.

Talking about such realities (as Death, Loss, and Grief) is taboo in our society, and many preconceptions shape basic understandings of how the grief process should work.

Many generations of families, cultural traditions, religious and spiritual beliefs, gender expectations, literature, media interpretations, and other influences have given birth to the perceptions we share.

You almost certainly approach the grieving process with some preconceived notions that may inhibit your healing process.

Understanding what you bring to your grief and what may get in the way of your healing may be helpful. Use the following list to help you discover what grief might mean to you and your family.

ReConceptions of Commonly Preconceived Ideas:

  • Grief is not about stages you go through and ultimately graduate from. Rather it is a dynamic process of ups and downs, fluctuating with painful and peaceful moments, hours, days, and weeks.

  • Grief is not something you get over. Instead it is an experience you must go through directly, taking in all the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that you encounter along the way.

  • Grief is not time-limited, nor does time heal all wounds. A common misconception is that you grieve for one year and on the anniversary of the loss you will return to "normal." This concept promotes a sense of failure and concern. In reality, grief demands the time it needs. Healing requires active participation in grieving.

  • Everyone does not experience grief in the same manner everyone else does. Grief is unique to each individual and experience. Give yourself permission to be free of others' expectations, and grant that freedom to others to explore and heal in ways that are real to them. Comparing and judging the losses and grieving processes of others is divisive, unproductive.

  • Grief cannot be avoided. It waits for you and eventually demands your attention. Approaching grief is often scary, and you may fear that it will upset you and others around you. But the pain is already there, and nothing can make it worse. Denial will not relieve the present anxiety--expression will. The open expression of grief is a challenge in our modern society.

  • Children and adults do not experience and express grief in the same ways. Children tend to grieve in small doses, followed by periods of play and distraction. They do not always have the information and words to express themselves. But yes, they are grieving.

  • Grief may isolate you from family and friends. Keeping it private and personal doesn't make it go away.

  • At times, people who are grieving may feel like having fun or laughing. You may need this. Fear of being judged or of piling on more guilt may prevent this. It's okay to take breaks from the exhausting work of grief.

~Thomas M. Ellis

This Thing Called Grief: New Understandings of Loss

Pictures, thanks to Grieving Mothers, and Remembering Homicide Victims

Wednesday's Woe - No Drama Mamas: 5 Things Different About Me After 5 3/4 Years of Grief

Blanche DuBois, "drama mama" in Streetcar Named Desire

Wednesday's Woe

No Drama Mamas: 
5 Things Different About Me 
5  3/4 Years of Grief

1) No Drama Mamas ~ I have enough drama going on in my grief-torn heart. There IS NO ROOM in my heart for "stupid" drama due to people's narcissistic need to put down or pound a grieving mother for their neurotic purposes. As I said to my teenagers years ago, all acting out in their dramatic ways about the time Easter came, and they were expecting the ever-gracious Easter Bunny who decided not to show up: "Don't shu-shu on grace," though I do believe I used the actual cuss word at the time.

2) Approaching "New Normalcy" on my work hours. I work for myself, having had a private practice in counseling for these 33 years of my career. As one client recently said, "Working for yourself means your job is to create jobs for yourself." Well, she was right. Self-employment means you have enough energy, self-discipline, and self-confidence to go out and create clients and then do the work of helping them get unstuck in life. Well, imagine what happens to all that when your child gets killed. Your own life becomes stuck in the mud - in the muck and mire of child-loss grief and trauma. For years, I just stumbled along with the clients I retained after my child died (many scurried due to the fear that comes with "death"). And with those remaining clients, I instructed them to call just before coming in for their appointment to make sure I was functioning that day.

3) I am more patient with certain clients, and impatient with others. In other words, if you come to me now, you'd better have "for real" problems (caused through little fault of your own). No whining allowed! With a grieving mother's perspective, you'd better be ready to "put the big-girl panties on" and deal with what life has thrown you. If so, then I'm gladly willing to roll up my sleeves to work hard alongside you.

4) Zero Tolerance for so-called "Christians," with their legalism, their superficial spirituality, and their desire to judge people simply for not obeying the "man-made" and often paganistic rules and rituals of today's church. Sweet Christians on the other hand who actually are living out the love of Christ in their hearts I need, and welcome.

5) Family. 'Nuff said. Who hurts you more than any other in your child-loss grief and trauma but family members who should know better. We no longer let people get away with cruelty just because they have "family member" written by their names.

Pictures, thanks to Jill Compton, and "I miss those close to me who are now in Heaven as Beautiful Angels"

Monday, May 21, 2012

Tuesday's Trust - The Grace Card ~Tommy and Angie Prince

Tuesday's Trust
The Grace Card

~Tommy and Angie Prince

Tonight, Tommy and I watched a movie... about what you ask? Just ask our two sons -- What do we do to take a break away from our grief and trauma? You probably guessed it ~ we watch a movie about grief or trauma!

We entered into watching this movie tonight with fear and trepidation as we've watched our share of "somewhat hoaky" to "pretty hoaky" movies about grief. We all know it is pretty hard to show what a child-loss parent's grief looks like...

And here comes this dvd that is made up of mostly volunteers... {We don't mind that of course ~ our nephew was an actor volunteer in "We Are Marshall" (he was the kicker on the football team), and our own son Rollin recently has been cast in one of these types of movies, one called "Laughing at the Moon," but this movie has not yet been released. (I'm sure you'll hear more about that later!)}

We were teasing each other before watching this particular grief movie, called "The Grace Card" by saying:

"We'll give it ten minutes...!"

We seem to have this need to check out all the movies we can about child-loss. 

Another movie we recently checked out was, "The Other Woman" ~ another movie about child-loss. Though it had a famous actress (Natalie Portman) starring in it, it seemed to fall flat to us. But then our standards are pretty high about whether people can "capture" such a grief as the one we are living out day by day, hour by grief-struck hour.

In the movie tonight, "The Grace Card," fortunately we were pleasantly surprised (if you can be pleasantly surprised about grief). The "grieving family" members were continuing to show the pain and struggle that I'm sure can still be with you after 17 years of grieving, complete with the toll such grief takes upon every family member, each feeling grief's pain and chaos in their own unique way. The main character, the "father" in particular (who is a Christian stand-up comedian by trade) did an excellent job of portraying the angst of a child-loss father: with the soul-searching questions, the guilt, the isolating oneself from others who don't or can't "get it," the power of life-stopping triggering moments, the guilt, the anger, the repulsion over "God-talk" when it is plastic, cliche, cheesy, or a quick cop-out versus the authentic experience of God that can be loving, comforting, challenging, growth-producing, and life-transforming. 

How many of us secretly harbor that self-blame still? How many of us feel the continued raw anger and wonder where is this coming from, and is this perhaps the start of bitterness, or is the anger mere self-protection needed to survive another day? This movie showed a simple but powerful concept of grace ~ grace toward others, and grace toward yourself amidst such grief. 

This movie seems to stand alone in showing the transcending quality that the spiritual component can bring to one's grief. The movie aptly captured both the angst of child-loss, but also the redemptive component that can come in child-loss as you learn to extend grace to yourself (and others) amidst your pain. 

And "The Grace Card" didn't show this redemptive quality in a cheap way, but in an authentic-enough way that we were right in the pain with the parent. And we were right there in the grace with him too. 

This movie is one that seemed to come close to capturing some of the real agony of a child-loss griever, and that of the other child-loss family members. And yet, it also presented a fairly authentic portrait of the grace that we trust is also an important aspect of our healing as God, by His tender mercy, enables us to learn ways to transcend our terrible angst and pain.

Picture, thanks to 

Monday's Mourning Ministry - The Lifeboat ~with David Phelps and Vestal Goodman

Monday's Mourning Ministry

The Lifeboat
~with David Phelps and Vestal Goodman

The Lifeboat
~David Phelps and Vestal Goodman
and their Homecoming Friends
 in The Gaither Homecoming Video
"Whispering Hope"

The life-boat soon is coming by the eye of faith I see 
As she sweeps through the waters to rescue you and me 
And land us safely on the Port with friends we love so dear 
"Get ready," cries the Captain, "O look, she's almost here!"

Then cheer, my brothers cheer, our trials will soon be o'er 
Our loved ones we shall meet, shall meet upon the Golden Shore 
We're pilgrims and we're strangers here, we're seeking a City to come 
The life-boat soon is coming to gather His Jewels home
The life-boat soon is coming to gather His Jewels home

Then cheer, my brothers cheer, our trials will soon be o'er 
Our loved ones we shall meet, shall meet upon the Golden Shore 
We're pilgrims and we're strangers here, we're seeking a City to come 
The life-boat soon is coming to gather His Jewels home 
The life-boat soon is coming to gather His Jewels home 

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Saturday's Sayings - Missing Your Light...

Saturday's Sayings
Missing Your Light...

There are days when troubles fall all around. 
When dark clouds bring hope crashing to the ground. 
The road once easy turns rugged and steep. 
Weary, bruised and broken you can only weep. 
But during these storms that life will send, 
God is with you to the very end.

~Jimmy McClendon



My Heart

it happened again today
as it has many times before

the bandage 
it loosened 
the stitches 
they broke free

all at once ruptured
and the life poured out

fragments now
carried by tears
waiting for kisses
tossed upon the currents
such beautiful music 

never again to be heard… 

~Grieving Mother, Tammy Brown in loving memory of Larry Brown




My tear stained voice
runs wearied to You,
as it carries a melody
that my heart misplaced.
Your light lifts
my tired and broken soul's voice,
as I hold up a heart,
in deep need of grace. 
Will You teach me to sing,
when I don't know the words
and the music won't flow.
Will You show me your song?
will You dance in my heart,
place my steps where they'll grow? 
My silent pen stands
on the blank, empty page,
while it waits to move forward
from this soundless place.
This story I'm living
was written by You.
Will you move in my pages
and carry me through? 
Will You teach me to read,
when I don't see the course
that You wrote for my life?
Will You show me your words,
that You wrote on my heart,
before You wrote time? 
Will You teach me to see?
Every moment You are
where You want me to be.
Will You show me Your way?
So I can live in Your truth
until my dying day. 
When I look to your Son,
I fall in His arms
and You tell me my journey is done. 

~Copyright 2010 Christi Armstrong
(Some capitalizations, mine)



My Child Has Been Set Free

Daughters hold a special bond
That nothing can replace
Their smiles can chase the blues away
And brighten up a face.

Joys we’ve known, a special day
Shared between us two
Secret talks and peaceful walks
Just to name a few.

Times of reminiscing
The day you learned to crawl
Looking through the photos
I’ve always kept them all.

But one sad day, the phone did ring
It tore my world in two
A voice came on the other end
“I have bad news for you.”

The precious girl, I loved so much
Was quickly leaving me
So many things we might have known
Will never come to be.

Thoughts of her are everywhere
I cannot let her go
But somewhere up in heaven
A star does softly glow.

She sees a Joy unknown to me
Her face is full of Light
They walk into the Promised Land
God holds her hand so tight.

Just as the shifting sands of time
Flows gently out to sea
Here today and gone tomorrow
My child has been set free.

Author/Written By:
Marilyn Ferguson

~via B.J.S.A.




  • ☜♡☞ Dancing With Angels ☜♡☞

    It’s just so hard to believe

    All I have to hold is your memory

    From this side of the clouds all I see is grief

    But on the other side I know you’re free

  • And you’re dancing, dancing with angels.

    Somewhere just out of my reach

    You’re keeping heavenly company

    When I’m feeling lonely it’s for myself I cry

    ‘Cause there aren’t any tears in paradise

  • When you’re dancing, dancing with angels.

    I can almost hear your laughter

    See the fullness of your joy

    Knowing that you’re present with the Lord

    And though today I miss you I know the day will come

    When every believer will behold the Son

  • And we’ll be dancing, dancing with angels.

    1997 Dayspring Music / Lehsem Music
    Words and Music by J. Mandeville & S. Siler
~via grieving parents, A.S. and G.M.D.


On my worst days I know
Your light will find its way to me.

Pictures, thanks to Grieving Mother ~ Jill C., Grieving Mother, Tammy Brown, Grieving Mother ~ D.T., Remembering Homicide Victims, Letters to Heaven, and Happy Heart Daily