Monday, March 28, 2011

Happy Birthday Merry Katherine! To my Forever Teen Angel...





Happy Birthday Merry Katherine!


To my Forever Teen Angel...





Happy 24th Birthday, baby girl,

Will you celebrate with Jesus atop our world?

I wish we could see you to catch a glimpse

Of your placid peace, like that I once dreamt;

Perhaps it could rest my grief for awhile

To catch a glimpse of your angelic smile...



I wish we could somehow be in your presence,

We'd surely shower you with love and presents;

But amidst your absence that makes our hearts ache,

Your brother gifts you... a precious namesake!

From Heaven, God sends His gift of life,

Reminders of His true heart amidst death's strife.



We met her through ultrasound yesterday

(near your birthday);

Her presence should grace Earth near your Heav'n day!

(Did you have any part, sending her our way?!)

Sweet glimpses of God's love, joy, and life from Above

Where our Savior holds you close to His heart of love.



Happy Birthday, sweet baby girl,

Forever teen angel since you left our world...

You hold our hearts daily since cold death unfurled;

May God show'r you with our love, as in His lap you curl...









Picture - Merry Katherine Prince, 3/29/1987 - 8/2/2006

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Monday's Mourning Ministry - 'Tis the Day Before Your Birthday... / I Will Carry You ~Michael W. Smith






Monday's Mourning Ministry


'Tis the Day Before Your Birthday...


I Will Carry You


~Michael W. Smith






Tis the Day Before Your Birthday...



'Tis the day before your birthday ~

My heart is feeling flat

Heaviness descends upon my heart, to weigh

It down, upon the ground,

Gripping it with a vice,

That throws me to the mat.



Fifth birthday without you--Pain, the price

I must pay till I am Homeward bound...









Sadly now, I walk through each and ev'ry day,

My heart yearning for you with such a grievous sound,

That communicates in such a way

As to cut through the Heav'ns, until God is found

To grab up this, His baby girl, help me find my way,

Through the pain, and outward bound,

Ministering to other precious grievers found.





Walking with pain day by day, I learn

To walk on through with Jesus, even as my heart does yearn,

Loving one another, for our grief, too oft, the world does spurn.


Holy Spirit, be Thou near us through each and ev'ry turn!





*****





Pat, Don't you think 'the passage of time' is what all literature is really about?


...It's all about the dance.


~Teacher Gene Norris to Pat Conroy, as Pat remembers in My Reading Life





*****







I Will Carry You


~Michael W. Smith




Sometimes I wonder if my beating heart has a reason

The thought of breathing only takes my breath away

I've spent so many nights wrestling with this feeling

Do I have the strength to make it through the day

But I was never meant

To walk this road alone

I can always trust you

When you say



(Chorus)

"I will carry you,

Be your strength

And pull you through

Reach for me

And take my hand

We will pray

And we will stand

In a world

Crying out for peace

Let your heart be strong

For when I am weak

You will carry me."



Sometimes you wonder if the road you're on has a reason

It's hard to go on when you just don't know

We can shoulder all the weight of life between us

Until the fear of what we cannot see is gone

'Cause we were never meant

To walk this road alone

We are bound together

When we say



I will carry you (I will carry you)

Be your strength

And pull you through

Reach for me (Reach for me, Reach for me)

And take my hand

We will pray

And we will stand

In a world

Crying out for peace (Crying out for peace)

Let your heart be strong

For when I am weak

You will carry me



Repeat Chorus











Poem - 'Tis the Day Before Your Birthday - Angie Bennett Prince - 3/27/11, for 3/28/2011

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Friday's Faith - Fatherhood... What Does a Father's Love Look Like?







Friday's Faith


Fatherhood...


What Does a Father's Love Look Like?






This morning Tommy was talking to our middle child, our son Nathan, who was expressing concern about his older brother Rollin who is soon (God-willing) going to be a new father. (!) {Yes! I am soon to become a Grandmother :) Sweet!}


Nathan was concerned that the adjustments to becoming a responsible father might be rather challenging for Rollin and voiced this by saying,


"I can't believe Rollin's gonna be a father. Well, I guess he needs to get used to changing diapers, and once he gets used to that, he'll be okay..."


(Talk about a naive, one-dimensional view of fatherhood!) Tommy disavowed him of such a simplistic view of fatherhood:


"You think that's the hard part?! That's the easy part! Changing diapers is the easy part compared to everything else...


"It's like you have to become a member of the Special Forces, in being in a state of high alert and being ready for anything at all times!"



He recounted a few incidents from their childhood to illustrate his point:



"Mommy and I had stepped out onto the patio outside the den of our first house when Rollin was about two years old and was busy playing just inside the house in the den..."


He went on to describe what I too remembered happening:


With his back to the opened glass door in the den, Tommy had overheard the pitter patter of little feet behind him, so he looked around and saw Rollin on his little push-car riding as fast as he could, heading straight for the opened glass doors and out toward the patio which was a good foot down (with two stairs down) between the den and the patio. But when Rollin got caught on the bottom lip of the sliding glass door tray-


his car abruptly came to a stop while Rollin's body came flying out the door...


At the same time Tommy was yelling, "NO!!!" he flew over to the patio door and caught Rollin's face in mid-air before it could hurl headlong past the two steps and down onto the concrete patio floor...



*****



Then he recounted a memory of when Nathan was almost two, and he had climbed up the flight of stairs in the basement of our "new" house, and he was so proud of himself that when he got to the top step, he stood straight up and threw his hands straight up into the air (as if he were signaling a touchdown), which made him lose his balance, and his upper body started leaning backwards, back down toward the flight of steps ...


Tommy was up at the top of the stairs urging Nathan on, when,


in alarm, he saw Nathan falling backwards almost out of his reach.


Though Tommy's eyes showed alarm, his mind was working double-time - SAVE THE CHILD WITHOUT FREAKING HIM OUT SO THAT HE WOULD BECOME DEATHLY AFRAID OF EVER CLIMBING THE STAIRS AGAIN. - So, Tommy made a game out of it while grabbing Nathan quickly out of danger...


Nathan says now, the beginning to fall backwards didn't scare him as much as seeing the sudden terror written all over his daddy's face...!



*****



Then he described the following incident that occurred when Merry Katherine was around three or four years old.


We were next door with all three kids at the neighbor's pool, when Tommy saw Merry Katherine walking down the side of the pool, headed straight for the deep end of the pool. Instinctually, he knew she was headed for the water. He was coming up out of his chair as she had just begun to jump into the water. (Nathan says - "It was like he was reading her mind, knowing exactly what she was planning to do...")


Springing out of the chair, Tommy was over to the side of the pool, scooping her up before she could even be afraid --


As she plunged under, he grabbed her straight up.


The boys said it seemed like it all happened in less than a second. Merry Katherine didn't even know she had been in any danger...



*****



Tommy continued clarifying the real dilemmas of being a father to Nathan by saying,


"Then the real fun began when you all became teenagers..."


At that exhausting note, Tommy walked up the stairs to finish his coffee, already worn out before the day had even begun...



*****


When Tommy told me about this conversation he had had with Nathan, I said,


"Isn't that interesting? They consume our lives when they're with us, and they continue to consume our lives when they leave us, (referring to Merry Katherine's having been killed, as our lives are now consumed with grieving her)."


Then I flashed to our Heavenly Father loving each one of us, His children, to an even greater degree!


And I began tearing up when I remembered His disclaimer in Scripture:



"And you think I would leave any one of my lambs behind if they got lost? No! I would leave the 99 lambs who didn't need Me, and go to whatever heights or depths needed to look high and low until I'd find that one little lost lamb who needs Me..."



(~my paraphrase of Luke 15:4)
















Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Thursday's Therapy - The Princes' Top 10 TRUTHs About Child-Loss Grief





Thursday's Therapy


The Princes' Top 10 TRUTHs


about Child-Loss Grief





#1) There ARE NO "Five Stages of Grief"!



#2) Nobody else really "gets it." The "Secondary Injury" comes when you hear someone you greatly care about telling you, "You're doing it wrong!"



#3) You will never be the same, and there is nothing "normal" about "The New Normal"!



#4) Child-Loss Grief is NOT something you can control or predict. (There are things you can do to keep your grief flowing in a healthy way, but not "control" it and "move on" as many people will unrealistically expect you to do.



#5) Everybody is different, so Everybody's Grief is different.



#6) Old losses can get re-opened...as well as the old ways we used to cope with them. You can expect to regress, and old self-destructive acts and addictions to re-surface.



#7) Child-Loss Grief is pervasive and invasive throughout your system. It is multi-dimensional, affecting your body, soul, mind, heart, and spirit. Your old beliefs about God, and about how the world works will be challenged.



#8)Child-Loss Grief will last forever, this side of Heaven. There is no such thing as Closure.



#9) As bad as the first year may feel, Child-Loss Grief typically hits bottom between years 2 to 4 1/2 when Shock wears off and Reality sets in, and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder takes on a life of its own.



#10) Child-Loss Grief is not JUST about Grief! Child-Loss Grief is MOSTLY about Trauma!











Picture, thanks to FotoSearch.com