Tuesday's Trust - The Greatest Grief

Tuesday's Trust

The Greatest Grief

Every grief is different and comes with its own extenuating circumstances. A homicide may involve police interrogations, courtroom proceedings, and years of additional legal issues before closure can finally be obtained. Some never experience closure. A loss from suicide may result in years of unresolved guilt or anger in addition to the grief. Loss of parents may result in foster care for younger children along with additional legal issues. Each loss carries with it a set of unique issues pertaining to that specific type of loss, even including financial hardships and relocation requirements. However different, however similar, grief is still grief.

After losing his father to renal failure and his teenage daughter to a freak vehicle accident, my uncle David stated, quite profoundly, "When you lose a parent, you lose your history. When you lose a child, you lose your future."

One thing still holds true: Any loss results in great grief.

Although I'm not sure I understand why it matters, there seems to be an un-uttered question resounding in the mind of everyone who is grieving: Is the grief I'm experiencing the greatest of all grief? Is my grief greater than everyone else's? As bad as our grief hurts, we can't imagine it could be any worse under any other circumstances. So we ask, who grieves harder, or longer, or more deeply?

It's as if we need to know: On a grief-scale of 1 to 10, where is my grief? Is this normal? We seem to need something to measure it by. Something to reassure us that what we are going through IS normal.

So, whose loss is greatest? Which truly is the greater grief? While in a small group discussion recently, these same questions arose. Who grieves harder or longer? Is the widow's grief greater than the parent? Is the mother's grief greater than the father's? Is grief greater when it's because of suicide? Or homicide? Or multiple grief?

The answer is really quite simple. The greatest grief of all is your own. It doesn't matter what anyone else says, or how anyone else tries to measure the loss. You aren't the first person to experience grief. But you are the first person to experience YOUR grief. Someone you loved deeply is gone. You can't bring them back. That's the aching reality of it all and there is no greater grief than that.

There is also no greater hope than the hope we have in Jesus Christ. For we rely heavily on His promises that life is eternal and we will be reunited with our loved ones again. This doesn't mean that we won't continue to grieve, missing our loved ones presence in the here and now, but our HOPE lies in the reunion in that place "where there is no more sorrow."

Jesus said, "Love never fails." That means it can never end. It is eternal. For love to be eternal, life must be eternal! As your love for the one no longer with you is eternal, find hope in His promise that "Love never fails."

May this greatest hope give you strength in your greatest grief, and may God bless you and bring you peace.

~thanks to "Grieving Mothers," Facebook

Picture and Post, thanks to "Grieving Mothers" on Facebook