Tools for finding hope along the journey: Honor the hole of grief
When someone dies we are left with a hole. It can seem dark and empty and something that we try to fill. It may seem a strange or impossible thought, but we can learn to honor the hole that is left, knowing that it represents and reminds us of the love that we have given and received.
Tools for finding hope along the journey: Trust
There is a certain innocence that is taken away when someone we love dies. We not only come to understand the fragility of life, we also find out how difficult it is to find support and understanding even among our family and friends. Life is unpredictable and we are no longer able to trust that things will continue as planned, to do so is like putting a building on shifting sand. What is solid and able to be trusted is the knowledge that each and every one of us can survive and flourish no matter what comes our way.
Tools for finding hope along the journey: Perspective
Shortly after the death of my 4 year old son someone asked me,
“Given all the pain you are feeling do you think it would have been better not knowing him?”
I answered immediately,
“I would suffer a hundred times this pain for the privilege of having known him.”
How could anyone imply that it would have been better for me if I had never known my son? Thinking about it I realized that if he had never been a part of my life I would be spared the pain but also denied the joy. I wouldn’t be who I am today if I had not known him. I would choose knowing him, even knowing all the pain of his death.
Pictures, Quotes, and Content thanks to grieving mother, Tanya Lord's "The Grief Toolbox"