Thursday, September 13, 2012

Thursday's Therapy - What do the Heavens Tell Us?

Thursday's Therapy 

What do the Heavens Tell Us?

Tommy and I talk with you often about the importance of remembering that we bereaved parents are not only grieving, but that we are also traumatized ~ in our body, soul, spirit, mind, strength, even to the point of the traumatization physically impairing our own brains such that we must attend to the the newly discovered self-healing processes that are available for us. As Richard F. Mollica points out in his 2006 book, Healing invisible wounds : paths to hope and recovery in a violent world, there is indeed self-healing available but it doesn't just happen by itself! Many of the pathways to healing have been discovered and found to work, but usually people have to be taught them, and led to use them for themselves.

The following comes from the editorial reviews of Mollica's book found on Amazon:

Can people heal, and if so, how? Richard Mollica has spent more than thirty years helping victims of trauma. Now he draws from hundreds of interviews, years of research, and his counseling experience to show us a new way of helping people overcome their pain. In limpid prose, Mollica, director of the Harvard Program in Refugee Trauma, celebrates ... "the capacity of persons to recover from violent events and to engage in self-healing." 

He describes the "Invisible Wounds" that many of us, traumatized by the violent deaths of our child, have experienced. He says, "while physical scars can be identified and accounted for by medical science, (Invisible Wounds, such as) psychological, spiritual and existential injuries remain hidden (even though they are) major harms."

(He emphasizes) the significant healing power of attuned listening to the "trauma story."

"Survivors must be allowed to tell their stories their own way. We must not burden them with theories, interpretations, or opinions.

(He explains that trauma) victims "suffer a divide in their conscious minds" between hope and despair… Furthermore, he has seen firsthand how victims of inhumanity have found the inner strength to overcome life-altering trauma with renewed faith and have even regained humor and optimism.

From his book:

Tommy and I particularly enjoyed the following quotes we had pulled from his book earlier this year when we first read his book. They reflect major truths we have found that soothe our Child-Loss trauma. We put them here tonight for you to ponder. I am sure we will develop these thoughts more in later posts.:

Looking up at the heavens, they (the traumatized) saw something that was eternally unaffected by human actions. The constellations fixed in nature, represent the permanence of life itself, a force that could not be dimmed by human cruelty. 

The traumatized person is challenged to establish a more direct line to God without the help of religious institutions or clergy.

~Healing invisible wounds : paths to hope and recovery in a violent world (2006), by Richard F. Mollica, MD, Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School; Mollica directs the Harvard Program in Refugee Trauma. He is the recipient of the Human Rights Award from the American Psychiatric Association.

Picture, Constellation Orion, thanks to Google Images


1 comment:

Donna said...

I am sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter. I know the pain of loss well. I lost my entire family in an instant...husband, son and daughter in an auto accident caused by someone else. I was the only survivor. This happened 26 years ago. The early years were rough (to say the least!) but, through the grace and strength of Jesus, I have been "restored." Joy is possible...we have to take the outstretched hand of Jesus and allow Him to heal us. And forgiving ourselves as readily as we forgive others. If you are interested, you might like to visit my blogsite at It is designed with Christian Hope to provide comfort and healing through sharing our Faith. Always remember..."reunion is coming!!!"

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