Amidst the Holidays ~
Keeping the Good...
We are coming out of Thanksgiving weekend and looking back on the time with awe. Looking back on our lives this weekend is somewhat like watching the immature pupa in the process of its transformation between larva and adult within its transitional state within the chrysalis. Going into the weekend, we knew certain new rules we have tried in years before would have to continue to be in place, such as,
- There will be no "crowds" of people in which we will gather. No large family-of-origin get-togethers. No massive amounts of interpersonal dynamics we will have to navigate through. No unnecessary tensions to get stirred up for no good reason.
- There will be no shopping furor or frenzy that we will force ourselves to contend with.
- There will be no extra activities undertaken which might weaken us down into an unnecessarily tired state.
- We will not force ourselves to do things just because that was what we always did.
- On top of that, I was contending with the somatic dysfunction that has plagued me these five years as my body struggles to tangle with the realities manifest that my heart, soul, spirit, body, and mind never wanted to happen but did anyway. So, I am learning, of necessity, to attend to what my poor body is requiring to stay healthy. Which includes the need for boundaries, saying "No" to tasks I ordinarily would have tackled "just because" a holiday is here, and that is what you do.
- And we will maintain a schedule of healthy activities like obtaining proper amounts of sleep, proper amounts of healthy exercise, eating the appropriate foods called for to which our bodies will respond well, hopefully.
- And we will open the door to sweet, low-key visits from just a few key people that we don't ordinarily get to spend enough time with, like our own two sons, and daughter-in-law, and granddaughter!
- So on the flip side of the weekend, we can see now how incredibly sweet the weekend was. The sacred was retained. The fluff was eschewed. And in doing so the purity of the sacred moments stand out in full relief, not muddied down at all by the usual toxicities that can often come with the holiday package. How sweet. How thankful we are that amidst our "new normal," such as it is, in some ways our holidays are spent in even BETTER ways than before, and that is such a relief to see! And for that major transition, I am so very THANKFUL. I am indeed THANKFUL that I can be THANKFUL on this Thanksgiving season!
- It even gives me a trust and a hope that our devastating child-loss grief can usher in much BETTER habits and rituals and family-togetherness than in years before! God is good, and I guess we are in a better position to really listen to His still small voice these days. Indeed, not everything about child-loss grief is bad. Some changes coming our way are not only good, they are very good!