Wednesday's Woe
Stabbing Set Backs
~Tommy Prince
In my attempts at reaching a level of being a "functional griever" (since we Child-Loss Grievers know there really is no such thing as a full recovery from our grief) in trying to deal with this severe grief and trauma over the loss of my baby girl, it's almost impossible in the midst of being constantly stabbed and pricked in my heart in my own home ~ walking by a bookshelf, and seeing a picture of Jody, one of her best guy-friends, with Merry Katherine at a church retreat, and BAM! ~ it just stabs me in the heart! Or I'll see a possession of hers, like her favorite earrings in her bedroom, and immediately I'll feel the stab in my heart ~ Then seeing a picture of her on the refrigerator ~even though it's there every day for me to see ~ sometimes catches me off guard and stabs my heart.
All of these events take me back to the days of normalcy, when she was right here with us ~ live and in person, in all the dimensions of her delightful personality...
With this journey we're on of trying to walk forward, little by little, I do seem to stumble along. Yet, it seems I keep getting set back with these stabbings that just stop me in my tracks. What am I to do?
It would be even worse for me to remove from the house any and all reminders of my daughter.
She will always be very much a part of my life, whether here or in Heaven!
Adding to the pain, anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays go beyond stabbings, to hammer blows that impede the progress further, and some of these are just around the corner...
Pictures, thanks to "Grieving Mothers"
1 comment:
Everything is a constant reminder of our son's absence. Everything.
I understand how you feel.
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