Blessed Father's Day - Daddies Who Have a Child in Heaven

Blessed Father's Day

Daddies Who Have a Child in Heaven

via 

~Grieving Fathers

People don't always see the tears a dad cries,

His heart is broken too when his child dies.

He tries to hold it together and be strong,

Even though his world's gone wrong.

He holds his wife as her tears fall,

Comforts her through it all.

He goes through his day doing what he's supposed to do,

But a piece of his heart has been ripped away too.

So when he's alone he lets out his pain,

And his tears come like falling rain.

His world has crashed in around him,

And a world that was once bright has gone dim.

He feels he has to be strong for others,

But Dads hurt too, not just the Mothers.

He searches for answers but none are to be found,

He hides behind a mask when he is feeling down.

He smiles through his tears,

He struggles and holds in his fears.

But what you see on the outside is not always real,

Men don't always show how they really feel.

So I'd like to ask a favor of you,

The next time you see a mother hurting over the loss of her child,

please remember…a Dad hurts too.

~~~

~Even Strong Men Cry~

You think because he’s a man he shouldn’t feel the pain,

of having his heart broken and tears that fall like rain.

Men you say are stronger and never show their fears,

they don’t let life destroy them, a fortress through the years.

Let me tell you of a battle waged daily on this dad,

leaving his heart in shreds with no happiness to be had.

Death came to call and took his loving son,

it left his heart broken, his world undone.

This battle has him crying and crawling on his knees,

if you listen you can hear him begging, "Why God, please?"

He sees what it has done to his children and his wife,

as they live daily with grief’s never ending strife.

Now his closest friend, his son, lives beyond the sky,

and when death comes to take your child..... even strong men cry. 

~Charlene Dickerson~ ©2001

~~~

Paul Newman, whose son died of an accidental drug overdose in 1978, said that everything in his life was divided into two periods, 

time before his son died and afterward.

~~~

When you become a Father……..

F = Fearless

A = Amazing

T = Tough

H = Heroic

E = Entertaining

R = Responsible

When Your Child Passes Away……………

F = Frantic

A = Angry

T = Tearful

H = Heartbroken

E = Emotional

R = Reserved

~~~

We are told, “It’s time to move on. Time to get over it. Time to get back to life.” 

How much time is enough time to “get over” death? 

And can we ever “get over” something as life-altering as the death of our child?

~~~

It's an exclusive club.

No one asked us if we wanted to join.

We never imagined we would be here,

but now that we are,

we are in for life.

A life sentence!!

~~~

I'm not sure that I'm ok,

Don't even think I'm fine,

I'm empty on the inside,

But not inside my mind.

My mind can't stop thinking,

What more could I have done,

I really can't stop wondering,

Where did everything go wrong.

I'm not really here at all,

Just the shell is left to see,

I have become someone,

I never thought I'd be.

A Grieving Father

~~~

The journey of grieving takes you from

loving in the presence,

to loving in the absence...

~~~

Don't say they're in a better place, 

please don't even start. 

Don't say that it was just their time  

when it's breaking my heart.

Don't tell me many die young or  

that their life was long 

Don't say that there's a reason   

or they're back where they belong.

Don't say that God needed them more  

or I know just how you feel. 

Don't give me any reasons   

when you're not at the wheel.

Don't tell me I'll get over it   

or any other thesis  

All I know right here and now   

my heart's shattered to pieces.

You don't need to say a thing   

there is nothing you can do. 

Just knowing that you're here for me   

when I've most needed you.

~Toni Kane

all-greatquotes.com

~~~

Letter From A Grieving Father

You can tell me that I'm not the only one hurting, or that he wouldn't want me to grieve. You could combine all the words in the English language, but that won't make this pain leave.

If you think that my jokes and laughter or my ability to complete any task are anything better than my smiles or silence, then you can't see past my mask.

If I seem inattentive or cold, or distant, uncaring, withdrawn... 

If I tell you that everything is fine, would you really know what's going on?

Life doesn't care, or even slow down. Much like a river, it's current can drown. My grief is an anchor that holds me down under as slowly it sets my whole world asunder. 

I'd like to escape and just disappear. But if I run far away from my problems down here, I'd fail much more worse than I've already done. I cannot escape, I cannot run.

I am the backbone that supports those that I love. Much like a column, I'm the support from above. I must be the strength, and as stoic as stone. Never to weaken even when I'm alone.

Never to falter, never to cry. Shedding no tears, these eyes must stay dry. I'll be the shining example of faith and of strength, not just for now-but at any length.

The distractions that are now only partially effective are slightly destructive and no longer corrective. 

This is what happens when I try to hide...I'm brought back to the night that my little boy died.

I'm just a man, and can handle many things. I've been through the worst that this world can bring. I wear those scars like my medals, and now I can see that healing from this is too much for me.

It turns out my toolbox is empty and my efforts were fruitless and my pitiful attempts are shallow and rootless, and in hindsight I should have called out to You... In hindsight I should have known what to do.

So, Heavenly Father, I hope I'm not imposing, but I'd like to request something in closing. From a father on earth with a shattered heart, would you please mend all of my broken parts?

- Matt Newton

~~~

I once had something special that money could not buy   

I had a special person but I had to say "Goodbye."  

If I was asked one question, Why I thought the world of you   

I could give a million answers and each one would be true.  

The heartache and the sadness may not always show   

People say it lessens, but little do they know.   

Meet me in my dreams please, and talk to me once more   

Ease the everlasting pain that makes my heart so sore.  

The road without you is so long, a tear for every mile   

But I know one day when I reach the end   

You will be waiting there with a smile.

Graphics, all thanks to "Grieving Fathers":

Grieving Fathers

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Grieving-Fathers/131616930235995

Graphic 1:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=169323223132032&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 2:

https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=597632006967816&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 3:

https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=636152219782461&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 4:

https://www.facebook.com/131616930235995/photos/a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995/638366176227732/?type=1&relevant_count=1

Graphic 5:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=645251605539189&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 6:

https://www.facebook.com/healinghandofgrief

https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=620975214633495&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 7:

https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=601949323202751&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 8:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=601272996603717&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 9:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=621038051293878&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 10:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=635265216537828&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 11:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=621554871242196&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Graphic 12:
https://mbasic.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=623765117687838&id=131616930235995&set=a.131661973564824.24127.131616930235995&source=46&refid=13

Wednesday's Woe - The Eyes of a Bereaved Parent ~Tommy Prince

..........I'm Always Under the Weather When You're Away…

Wednesday's Woe

The Eyes of a Bereaved Parent

~Tommy Prince

We don't see things the way we used to since our child died. 

Child-Loss Grief changes the way we see things. 

Our perspective changes.

..........Our values are challenged...

We have an advantage over the general population because now we know what's really important. 

I caught a glimpse of my face in one of those ipads my son had zeroed in on me; I was surprised at how sad my eyes look. You remember the precious-moments figurines? 

There's a precious moments figurine's expression that's permanently etched on my face...

The brightness is gone. 

..........You were Daddy's Little Sunshine…

It went with her. 

..........You Are Always in My Heart…

I can feel the brightness return momentarily when I see my granddaughter Ellie, 

..........but then it's gone...

Then the precious moments figurine look comes back. 

..........Merry Katherine, 

..............................Baby Girl, 

........................................You Hold the Key to Daddy's Heart… 

Pictures, thanks to www.preciousmoments.com 
Poem - Valentine's Poem to My Daughter in Heaven - Tommy Prince - 02/12/2013

Wednesday's Woe - A Life Sentence: Death's Impact on the Victim's Family ~Tommy and Angie Prince

Wednesday's Woe

A Life Sentence: 

Death's Impact on the Victim's Family

~Tommy and Angie Prince

The child-loss family has been given a life sentence.  Some parents' children were murdered. The perpetrator may indeed be given a "life sentence" for having done something wrong, yet even then a life sentence does NOT mean a whole life-time. Some of these perpetrators are already out of prison, "going on" with their lives. Yet child-loss parents, no matter how our children have died or been killed, cannot "go on" with our lives for our sentence is indeed for a lifetime, and our only "crime" was to love their child with all of our heart. 

The general public on the other hand, does not "get it": not only can they be ignorant as to the multi-dimensional aspects of child-loss grief and trauma so that we receive little love and support in our "invisible disability." But on top of that, many are ready to unleash judgment on us because we can't seem to live our "normal" lives any more. So then what we receive is NOT support, but what we often DO receive is contempt. And this contempt is piled on top of our already Life-long sentence.

Picture, thanks to Grieving Mothers