Tuesday's Trust - Loss

Tuesday's Trust

Loss

Love

is so rare, any such handful of ash

holds the whole world's weight.

~Mary Karr

******

The following poem, written by Mary Karr, with change of adjectives and gender could describe my own experience...

ENTERING THE KINGDOM

~Mary Karr

As the boy's bones lengthened,

and his head and heart enlarged,

his mother one day failed

to see herself in him.

He was a man then, radiating

the innate loneliness of men.

His expression was ever after

beyond her. When near sleep

his features eased towards childhood,

it was brief.

She could only squeeze

his broad shoulder. What could

she teach him

of loss, who now inflicted it

by entering the kingdom

of his own will?

******

...When is it late enough to write about our loss, in a way that can be redemptive? Perhaps, like Milosz...

Late Ripeness

Not soon, as late as the approach of my ninetieth year

I felt a door opening in me and I entered

the clarity of early morning.

One after another my former lives were departing

like ships together with their sorrow.

And the countries, cities, gardens, the bays of seas

assigned to my brush came closer,

ready now to be described better than before.

I was not separated from people, grief and pity joined us.

We forget—I kept saying—that we are all children of

the King...

~Czeslaw Milosz

Quote, Mary Karr, from poem, "A Tapestry Figure Escapes for Occupancy in the Real World, Which Includes the Death of Her Mother," Mary Karr, Sinners Welcome, p. 43

Poem, "Entering the Kingdom," Mary Karr, Sinners Welcome, p. 32

Poem, a portion of the poem, "Late Ripeness," by Czeslaw Milosz, as quoted by Mary Karr in Sinners Welcome, p. 93

Monday's Mourning Ministry - Unredeemed

Monday's Mourning Ministry

Unredeemed

My amazing friend/mother-in-grief Danielle (@DanielleHelms on Twitter) sent me the following song this week on Twitter; it so ministered to my heart, I wanted to post it here for you to be ministered to as well.

The following transcript is of Todd Smith, the male lead singer for Selah. He is the husband of Angie Smith, a fellow grieving-mother as well as a fellow-blogger. As Todd mentions here, he and Angie lost their baby Audrey Caroline on April 7, 2008...

Also, Angie has written a book - I Will Carry You: The Sacred Dance of Grief and Joy - about the experience. Angie's blog is "Bring the Rain."

So, to introduce this wonderful song, here's the grieving-father, Todd:

Hey we're Selah, and we have a new album coming out called, "You Deliver Me." It's coming out this summer. and many of the songs on this CD are very personal to us. We have a lot of hymns, but a couple of originals, and this one in particular was written by some friends of mine.

Over this past year, I lost my daughter, and my sister Nicol who used to be in Selah, she also lost her son within about a six-week period, and so it's just been a very, very difficult year, just with a lot of ups and downs. And, you get to the point where you have to make a choice,

Are you going to trust in God? Are you gonna trust that He is good, even when things don't make any sense?

That's something we've really struggled with, my wife and I, Nicole and her husband... There are some days where things are great, and then there's a lot of days where things are just horrible. And a friend of mine - we'd finished recording everything - this song was not supposed to be on the record - ...Chad Cates and Tony Wood wrote this song and I had a writing session with them, and Chad said, "Hey just listen to this song..."

And, I was like - Great... you know, we'd listened to 50 million songs, and we were done, we were over it - And he played it for me, and just immediately it just struck me because of where my wife and I are at, and my whole family, what we've been going through...

And so I sent it off to Amy and to Allen, and Amy emailed back the next day, "We've gotta put this (song) on the c.d." And basically, to sum it up it's just a reminder

When we don't know what is going on, when we don't know why God allows things, or why He even does things, someday He IS going to make everything right and He's going to redeem everything that's been unredeemed...

and that's the title of this track...

Unredeemed

from album

"You Deliver Me"

written by

Chad Cates, Tony Wood, Brian David Petak

by Selah

The cruelest world

The coldest heart

The deepest wound

The endless dark

The lonely ache

The burning tears

The bitter nights

The wasted years

Life breaks and falls apart

But we know these are

Places where grace is soon to be so amazing

It may be unfulfilled

It may be unrestored

But when anything that's shattered is laid before the Lord

Just watch and see

It will not be unredeemed

For every choice that led to shame

And all the love that never came

For every vow that someone broke

And every lie that gave up hope

We live in the shadow of the fall

But the cross says these are all

Places where grace is soon to be so amazing

It may be unfulfilled

It may be unrestored

But when anything that's shattered is laid before the Lord

Just watch and see

It will not be unredeemed

Oh he will wipe every tear

It will not be unredeemed!

Places where grace is soon to be so amazing

It may be unfulfilled

It may be unrestored

But you never know the miracle the Father has in store

Just watch and see

It will not be...

Just watch and see

It will not be...

unredeemed

******

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more...crying or pain.

~Revelation 21:4

My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to You –

I, whom you have redeemed.

~Psalms 71:23

In Your unfailing love You will lead the people You have redeemed.

~Exodus 15:13

Song: Unredeemed on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhOSspNj84w

Picture of the Cross:

http://www.freefoto.com/preview/05-36-66?ffid=05-36-66&k=The+Cross

Selah's story:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TC01HuKZRI

Angie Smith's Blog: http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/

Angie Smith's Book: http://bit.ly/c7YHVM