Showing posts with label New Relationship with Child. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New Relationship with Child. Show all posts

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Blessed Mother's Day - My Note to My Child on Mother's Day: The Gift Within the Grief or One Death on Earth… One Million Heart-Strings to Heaven






A mother only grieves because she loves so deeply.

~Carly M. Dudley




Blessed Mother's Day

My Note to My Child on Mother's Day:

The Gift Within the Grief

or

One Death on Earth…
One Million Heart-Strings to Heaven














One death on earth yields
One million heart-strings straight to Heaven,
Seemingly pulled and tormented daily,
Missing you these years past ~ seven
now, and counting. Wrapped you are
around my heart, feeling each beat beating
even as you go about your Heavenly tasks,
even as I feel you tugging each step of your way 
on the heartstrings within which our love basks.

Bearing this grief seems somehow a gift
as it connects me this closely with you,
going deeper in my heart that I ever thought
it could go, ever reminding me of our
equally deep love, so that it gives my heart a lift!

(How can I reject bearing 
this cross when it bears you as well,
knowing I had the privilege of loving you
here those nineteen years, and loving you
seven more now from here to There?)

My mothering continues on, in Spirit 
now, not flesh…! So painful, yet, a blessing,
still getting to love you, and that deeply tender 
heart (that cried harder than any of ours each
time we lost an animal while you were here… )

What a gift, what a blessing, to know 
such a love as ours, that keeps on going on,
even growing deeper and deeper, 
(if that is even possible!).
I cry for you so deeply with these mother's tears
that never cease to run dry despite all these years.
What a marvelous love is that, from one soul
touching another?! 

It can only lead one to the Creator's 
heart, what deep deep Love He had for us
that He gave us this love, one for the other. 
(Some people around can't understand what
continues to make me cry; perhaps I should grieve
for them too if they have not such a love as you and I.)

Though grief feels like a curse that keeps me broken 
down, it rends my heart toward Heaven, ever keeping
me on Sacred Ground! Even He, our LORD, was
One well acquainted with Grief, grief  so important in His
Kingdom that even He was not spared that deepest pain 
that can only look to our Heavenly Father for sweet relief. 

So important are our tears to Him, He even 
stores them up in bottles! (Whatever will He do 
with them, these oceans of tears we cry?) He even 
designed in them , now we are told, key ingredients
that soothe our hearts and bring us immediate relief!
It is so like Him to take our cross, and use it to bless us
with deeper blessings than we can see, like cherishing a 
love that lasts through the years, growing deeper every 
year, making our hearts more tender, drawing our hearts 
closer to His! 

He comforts us that all creation groans; it is not only we
mothers who long for our children too soon taken away, 
and yet we get the Greater Grief, for love such as ours will not 
affect us gently; it renders us down upon the ground, gasping 
for breath through each tear. Oh what a vast and bottomless 
love that demands such grieving rounds! 

So my child, I am beautifully blessed this Mother's Day 
to have my heart strung out across a town and two 
states loving your brothers here, and my heart 
strung out all the way to Heaven, loving you
through every tear! 

Thank you for blessing my Mother's Day
with reminders of your love, for visiting me in a dream this week, 
surprising me too with chuckles each day when I see things
I know are from you, a laugh we can share that only your 
unique sense of humor could have sent my way, and so many
other sweet touches that bless my heart each day. 

Hold Mommy close in your heart and prayers, knowing how 
much I long for you, and hold me especially close this 
Mother's Day as I still reel from my short "visit" with you in that dream; 
it brings hefty sobs each time I remember it (for I was sitting next to you!). 

Continue to pull on these million heart strings; 
I feel your loving touch with every one, and 
somehow I'll be able to smile through every tear...

Thank you for your deep, deep love you've poured out for me today 
and every day, and thank our LORD for giving me a precious 
daughter that so lovingly affects me that way. 

Give Mother/GrandMommy my love and a "Happy Mother's Day!"
 through a big hug and a kiss from me. (She's cried with me, too,
 celebrating your love, and loves and guides me each day!)

I love you and miss you and long to be with you, but I thank you 
that you ever remind me I'm just a heart-string and a prayer away…!



Poem - The Gift Within the Grief or One Death on Earth… One Million Heart-Strings to Heaven ~Angie Bennett Prince - May 8, 2014


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Wishing all mothers who have a child in Heaven a 

~Peaceful Mother's Day~



~~~





You don't 'Stop being a Mother,'
When a child passes away…
Now you nurture 'Spirit,'
As you go from day to day…
Never will you forget them,
Your bodies were once one…
they will live within your soul,
And are never really gone…
The Heaven's know your sorrow,
And every tear that you have cried…
They too have 'mourned a loss,'
When someone they loved died…
Have 'Faith' in your Heavenly Father,
And in Jesus Christ His Son…
He was 'Our Living Example,'
And Death we'll overcome...

~Poem ©Mary G. ~ Love for All










Top graphic, thanks to
Carly M. Dudley, grieving mother
http://123parades.com/grieving-mothers-grieving-mothers-in-the-2014/

Middle two graphics, thanks to
~Grieving Mothers

Final graphic, thanks to
grieving mother, Ramona Kryski
http://www.pinterest.com/ramonakryski/grieving-mothers/


Saturday, April 26, 2014

Saturday's Sayings - When "Life Takes What Matters," Are We to... "Let Go" and "Move On," or "Hold On in a New Way"?






Saturday's Sayings

When "Life Takes What Matters,"

Are We to...

"Let Go" and "Move On," 

or "Hold On in a New Way"?















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"He whose hand formed us knows how to put us back together when life's losses have left us in pieces. When we've been caught in the rain that 'falls on the just and the unjust,' He will bring us through. 

"He is the great Healer. He is unequaled at creating something from nothing. He even knows how to bring life from death. So certainly we can trust Him with our pain our loss, our brokenness and our very lives."


~When Life Takes What Matters









Graphics, thanks to
2012 - Love and Loss/FB

Bottom graphic from book by Lenzkes, Susan: When Life Takes What Matters


Friday, June 7, 2013

Saturday's Sayings - The Nature of Grief and Healing... - Part Two






Saturday's Sayings

The Nature of Grief and Healing...

Part Two









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You cannot rush your way
through grief. Grief unfolds
with the same exquisite
timing as the rose, left to
blossom on its own time, 
until the colors slowly fade
and the petals fall away of their own accord.

~Margaret Brownley

via ~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore

~~~






~~~






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I feel like this from time to time, until I recognize my grief simply mirrors my deep love and loss... 
and I realize, in feeling that intense love and loss, that it draws me closer to my child…
which draws me ever closer to God, crying out to Him...
as He draws near to me with His comfort and love...
and in such a place of grace and love, I feel that I am on holy ground…



~~~




Where there is sorrow
There is holy ground.

~Oscar Wilde



There is a sacredness in the sorrow we feel when we lose our child. It is to be honored at all times.

~2012: Love and Loss and ~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore


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Somewhere in time, my beloved one,
Our hearts will meet again...
And what an extraordinary
moment
That will be..

~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore


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Graphics, thanks to ~Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, ~2012: Love and Loss, ~MISS Foundation (dot) org

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Monday's Mourning Ministry - Life Without You ~Stevie Ray Vaughan






Monday's Mourning Ministry

Life Without You

~Stevie Ray Vaughan






Life Without You

~Stevie Ray Vaughan


Oo oo now baby.... 
Tell me how have you been 
We all have missed you.... 
And the way you grin 
The day is necessary.... 
Every now and then 
For souls to move on.... 
Givin' life back again, and again 
Fly on fly on.... 
Fly on my friend 
Go on.... 
Live again.... 
Love again

Day after day.... 
Night after night 
Sittin' here singin' every minute.... 
As the years go passing by.... 
By, by, by 
Long look in the mirror.... 
We've come face to face 
Wishin' all the love we took for granted.... 
Love we have today 

Life without you.... 
All the love you passed my way 
The angels have waited for so long.... 
Now they have their way 
Take your place....










Grief Picture: ~The Compassionate Friends of Atlanta Siblings Group via ~Grieving Mothers~B.J. Karrer

Grief Song: http://youtu.be/X7PQNvRZ10w

The research from one of Stevie Ray's fans seems to indicate that this version of "Living Without You" was played at the concert of 29 November 1989 at McNichols Sports Arena, Denver, Colorado, less than nine months before Stevie Ray Vaughan's untimely death at age 35 on a helicopter heading from a concert he had played in Wisconsin that was attempting to fly through the dense fog to Chicago on August 26, 1990.


Saturday's Sayings - Always Close . . .







Saturday's Sayings

Always Close . . .









~Grieving Mother, TeriAnn Sargent



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~2012: Love and Loss



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~Out of the Ashes



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~Out of the Ashes



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~St. Paul Chapter of The Compassionate Friends



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~Out of the Ashes


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~Hope for the Broken Hearted



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~The Grief Toolbox


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~The Far Side of the Rainbow, thanks to TeriAnn Sargent



When those we love have left this earth, 
we still can feel them near. 

We'll see a picture, hear a song, 
and it's just like they are here. 

And when we call upon our faith, 
when we believe and trust, 
We know the ones we care about are always close to us.

~ Constance Parker Graham


~~~



~Out of the Ashes












Angel picture and poem shared by 



Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Tuesday's Trust - Our Ongoing Bond with Our Child ~ How God Made It Possible





Tuesday's Trust

Our Ongoing Bond with Our Child ~

How God Made It Possible 









In this past week's Saturday's Sayings, I made the comment, "Bodies may have boundaries but spirits have none. Why shouldn't we feel the potent, abiding presence of our beloved child when we are at our most vulnerable, and therefore open in our spirit?" 


As we go into this Easter weekend, may we stop to consider what made our ongoing bond with our child possible.

This weekend, we will celebrate Easter, first on "Good Friday" as we meditate and soberly consider what our Lord Jesus Christ accomplished for us on the cross, and then on Sunday as we celebrate what God our Father accomplished by raising Him from the dead three days later in what we call Jesus's  resurrection from the dead.

Jesus's death on the cross, His resurrection from the dead, and His later ascension into Heaven was the culmination of Christ's work on earth wherefore Christ won victory forever over Sin, Satan, and Death for each and everyone of us who look to Him in faith and believe in His saving work for us. Jesus made it clear while He was on earth that He did not have to die; He willingly chose to die in obedience to God the Father. The price for Sin has been paid; Death has been conquered; the Victory over Satan has been won!


Jesus breathes the Holy Spirit into His children-by-faith, so the Living Son of God lives in each of us and in each of our children who trust Him by faith. God's Holy Spirit is living and active then in each of His children and communes to us and in us from and with our Lord God.

How precious to know that our "angels" who have gone before us into Heaven are just beyond the Veil and are alive in Christ because of the sacred events that happened on that first Easter weekend over 2000 years ago.



We know that Jesus continues to care for us, for our children, for all His flock like a Shepherd cares for his lambs. Even today, we know that He carries us and our lambs in His arms and holds us close to His heart. (Isaiah 40:11) He became the Lamb of God, taking away the sins of this earth. He is the Lamb, and He is our Shepherd!




Hebrews 11 speaks to us about our loved ones who have gone on to Heaven before us (we often refer to them as "being just beyond the Veil,") pulling for us as we continue to accomplish the good works that they started. (What a beautiful picture of the active involvement our loved ones have in our lives!) (See Hebrews 11:39-40 through Hebrews 12:1.)

Hebrews 12 starts out acknowledging that since we "are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses" watching us, "let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him, endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." (Hebrews 12:1-2)

Remember these words this Easter as you mourn for Jesus on Good Friday as He gave His all for us on the cross, and then as you celebrate on Sunday that He rose from the dead, having conquered death for all of us who look to Him in faith. (Many days later, many watched as Christ ascended to Heaven where today He sits at the right hand of the Father.)

What a cause for celebration both for us and for our beloved children!

How beautiful that Jesus assures us in His Word, "he who believes in Me will live, even though he dies"!!!

Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die."
~John 11:25-26a





Because of Jesus's great love for us, and His Father God's greatest sacrifice ever known to man (now that we know what it is like to lose a child, we are even more amazed that our loving God loved us enough to give up His only Son for us), we and our children can live again even though we die.


For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him shall not perish but shall have everlasting life.
~John 3:16



And we can trust that our child is not only alive, but is actively watching over us, ever pulling for us from just beyond the Veil in Heaven!












Pictures, thanks to, (chronologically, from first to last:)
~Jesus Christ Savior by BeliefNet
~Blowing Kisses to Heaven
~Grieving Mothers
~~~~Becky's Encouragements~~~
~Grieving Mothers
~Grieving Mother, Ce Thibodeau

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Saturday's Sayings - Progress in the Healing Journey… - Part Nine






Until you're broken,
You don't know
what you're made of.

via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook*



Saturday's Sayings

Progress in the Healing Journey…

Part Nine






"He who has gone, so we but cherish his memory, abides with us, more potent, nay, more present than the living man."

~Antone de Saint-Exupery



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"Amidst our Child-Loss Grief and Trauma, when you think about it, we have been assaulted emotionally, physically, and spiritually! We never really 'heal' from Child-Loss Grief and Trauma, but we're always in recovery. 
"We can be in a process of healing, but healing will not completely happen this side of Heaven."

~Angie and Tommy Prince
Mother Grieving Loss of Child blog



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"The case of a parent losing a child is very special because the most deep-seated protective and nurturant emotions are brutalized. Because this “injury” is so severe to such primitive emotional processes, the grieving parent is likely to feel and express the pain associated with it for the rest of his or her life."

~Dr Joanne Cacciatore




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If indeed there are "stages" to our Child-Loss Grief, then this may be the best list:



THE SIX STAGES OF GRIEF

1. Sadness
2. Overwhelming Sadness
3. Incomprehensible Sadness
4. Crippling Sadness
5. Misery and Despair
6. Acceptance of Your Never-Ending Sadness


via ~Wings of Hope-Living Forward

~~~~~






My emotions are too much to bear

I'm blinded and can't imagine the ones who care

It starts with a memory, then the sadness creeps inside

I debate whether to tell anyone; I have too much pride

I have soo many friends and family but feel so alone

However though, I don't want any visitors in my home, 

putting on a front so no one can see the sad unhappy lonely me

Feels like a fight; beating the ever life within me

Flashbacks of my Loved one haunt me every night

It's like it's happening all over again and I don't like the sight

having a battle in my mind and I'm losing the war

My tears stream down my face as I lie on the floor

I'm usually a very happy person and can brighten anybody's day


But when it comes to my painful grieving, it doesn't work my way


via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook* 




~~~~~





"To overcome Grief
One has to fully surrender to the process."



via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook*




~~~~~





Please do not tell me how I should be

You really don't know what is happening to me.

You may feel exhausted by my grieving so hard

Doesn't make you an expert to drill me with no regard

I'm doing my best to overcome my grief

Living in this hell daily; I wish it was brief!

If you don't like what you see just turn around

I don't have a light switch to shut it down.

I know I can overcome this in time you will see

for this grieving process to be ceased

So Understand my dilemma or don't say a word

Either/or, crying and sadness needs to occur.


via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook*







~~~~~





You never stop loving 

someone

You just learn to live

without them.


via ~Remembering Loved Ones/Facebook* 




~~~~~





I will always be near,

although you cannot see me.


~Unknown author


via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook*




~~~~~





Grief was never meant to keep us sad or (too) lean
but how does one come out of it when people are so mean.

When someone you love deeply is not living anymore,
The feelings are great, beyond words can (implore).

It knocks a strong man to his knees begging and (pleading),
Makes our Faith be questioned, searching for meaning.

It's an unexplainable jolt, a pain that devours our sanity,
Keeps us wondering if we can save our own family.

All I have mentioned is part of the Journey;
You can't rush grieving, there's no such remedy.

Days become months, then Years soon to follow;
Whatever it takes, Don't let (any)one make you shallow.


via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook*




~~~~~






My Loved one has gone and the pain is so deep.

It's like living on auto pilot with a triggered weep.

So many scenes and reflections run through my mind

A Happy Strong Family we all were; once upon a time

Does God know my devotional faith has shook?

I can't go on pretending or open His good book

I feel so betrayed from all that has happened to us.

People say it's part of a master plan. "We need to trust"

"God has his reasons and one day you'll find"

"Why your precious Loved one had to die"

I replied, "Spare me your religion and repetitive speech"

"There's nothing left from me; My faith has breached"

Total disappointments, my mind left with conscious reality

Crying hard not knowing it's getting the best of my sanity.

Only time can make me come back to understand

For now I'm living in this torture with no future plans.


via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook* 



Our faith has been "breached" at some level by our child's death. God is real, but there are some myths somewhere along the way that we have swallowed, and now we must sort out myth from truth. Even those of us who have been blessed with a depth of knowledge in Scripture and a long walk with God Himself, have unwittingly swallowed some of the "cliches, smug sanctities, cheap slogans…" running rampant in today's religiosity that ultimately "woo falsely or promise glibly," and now it is incumbent upon us to separate out the chaff from the wheat of our Faith.

~Angie Bennett Prince

(phrases in quotes, by Jerry Sittser)




~~~~~





via ~Death of a Loved One/Facebook


In our western culture, we tend to forget the value that Jesus, God's own Son showed for the children around Him. When we think about our little ones being so vulnerable before they were killed, perhaps it can help us to realize that Jesus spoke many parables about the importance of the Shepherd seeking out His sheep, never leaving one behind but doing whatever it would take to go and find them and rescue them for Himself... 

When His own disciples tried to shun the little children away from One so important as Jesus, Jesus reprimanded them saying, 

"Suffer the little children to come unto Me and forbid them not, for of such is the Kingdom of Heaven."

~Matthew 19:14 


~Angie Bennett Prince
Mother Grieving Loss of Child blog




~~~~~






"He who has gone, so we but

cherish his memory, abides

with us, more potent,

nay, more present

than the living man."

~Antone de Saint-Exupery


~Out of the Ashes/Facebook*



Bodies may have boundaries but spirits have none. Why shouldn't we feel the potent, abiding presence of our beloved child when we are at our most vulnerable, and therefore open in our spirit? Newest psychological research recognizes one of the most invaluable aspects of a Child-Loss parent's grief process is that of establishing a bond with our deceased child, and this ongoing bond is vital in enabling us to Progress in our Healing Journey.


~Angie Bennett Prince











Picture, "Broken" thanks to ~Death of a Loved one

*Death of a Loved One/Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Death-of-a-Loved-one-Quotes-Poems-and-Resources/310515538965543?sk=info

*Remembering Loved Ones/Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Remembering-Loved-Ones/338742372882107

*Out of the Ashes/Facebook