Monday's Mourning Ministry - Hold My Heart ~Tenth Avenue North

Monday's Mourning Ministry

Hold My Heart

~Tenth Avenue North

Hold My Heart

Tenth Avenue North

How long must I pray, must I pray to You?

How long must I wait, must I wait for You?

How long 'til I see Your face, see You shining through?

I'm on my knees, begging You to notice me.

I'm on my knees, Father will you turn to me?

One tear in the driving rain,

One voice in a sea of pain

Could the maker of the stars

Hear the sound of my breakin' heart?

One light, that's all I am

Right now I can barely stand

If You're everything You say You are

Won't You come close and hold my heart

I've been so afraid, afraid to close my eyes

So much can slip away before I say goodbye.

But if there's no other way, I'm done asking why.

Cuz I'm on my knees, begging You to turn to me

I'm on my knees, Father will you run to me?

One tear in the driving rain,

One voice in a sea of pain

Could the maker of the stars

Hear the sound of my breakin' heart?

One light, that's all I am

Right now I can barely stand

If You're everything You say You are

Won't You come close and hold my heart.

So many questions without answers, Your promises remain

I can't sleep but I'll take my chances to hear You call my name

To hear You call my name

One tear in the driving rain,

One voice in a sea of pain

Could the maker of the stars

Hear the sound of my breakin' heart?

One light, that's all I am

Right now I can barely stand

If You're everything You say You are

Won't You come close and hold my heart.

Hold my heart, could you hold my heart?

Hold my heart.

Today's song, "Hold My Heart" is in appreciation to Danielle Helms who recommended the song through Twitter this week. Amazingly, I first met Danielle through Twitter, and she has become one of my very best friends through our grieving over our girls together. Danielle's Kristin and my Merry Katherine were killed only two weeks and two days apart in 2006. My heart is especially heavy for my friend as she grieves her "teen angel" Kristin this week on what would have been her 20th birthday. My heart and prayers are with you especially this week sweet Danielle, "Sister in The Bond Of The Endless Ache!"

In Honor of

Kristin Danielle Helms

6/5/1990 - 7/17/2006

Age 16

You may read more about Kristin at

http://www.kristinhelmsfoundation.org/

Kristin Helms Internet Safety Foundation

Danielle did an amazing job on this news report, in honor of her 16-yr-old daughter and in hopes of saving some other precious children's lives. Despite her horrific grieving, Danielle shares with the world how her precious daughter's life was destroyed. It's horrifying and incredibly sad to know that even a child born and raised in such a loving Christian home can be susceptible to an internet predator pretending to care for her. Danielle wrote on her 5/31/10 Twitter site:

Kristin's Story~KNBC 4 Los Angeles~ "I Honor Your Beautiful Life By Speaking For You With Mine!"~ http://bit.ly/bIaBBR

{{{♥Love and hugs to you, Danielle. Thank you for sharing your heart with us even amidst your devastating grief.♥}}}

Song: Hold My Heart by Tenth Avenue North http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sd6U5ci_uB8&feature=related

Story of Kristin Helms is on the Kristin Helms Internet Safety Foundation website http://kristinhelmsfoundation.org/
Kristin's news report: http://bit.ly/bIaBBR

Monday’s Mourning Ministry — If You Want Me To

Monday’s Mourning Ministry

If You Want Me To

Contrast of Worlds—Confusing

To think of her, I’m so confused O God.

When she was here, she was so unhappy,

Driven to a lifestyle that enslaved her,

Leaving her with decisions made rashly.

And I…so scared, so worried about her,

One day close to her, the next far away—

Yet always, a wall of lies between us

Kept our mommy-daughter closeness at bay.

And then…one rash decision too many,

Determined was she t’ go t’ the beach with friends…

One smoked marijuana with meds that morn,

Then drove ‘nd crashed to bring her ‘nd two friends t’ their ends.

But then, last night I saw pictures of her,

Sweet pictures I had never seen before...

A couple of years before death—happy—

Like she was back; it shook me to the core.

Why Lord, could she not be back here happy

Like I know she is now, but there with You—

It’s so confusing to know—she’s at peace

When Mommy’s left behind, feeling so blue.

Our contrast of worlds is so confusing.

My whole life was aimed at getting her peace,

And now she has it—I can’t be with her—

How does a mommy deal with life’s caprice?

Is this a demonstration of where I

Must decrease for my child, You must increase,*

Knowing she was in such misery here—

Accepting You attained her sweet release?

Our contrast of worlds is so confusing.

Perhaps You too could bring her mommy peace

To trust You worked out for her what was best,

‘nd trust You’ll work through grief t’ bring me sweet release…

*He must increase, but I must decrease.

John 3:30 KJV

***

One of Merry Katherine’s favorite songs that spoke to her heart speaks to me as well…

If You Want Me To

by Ginny Owens

***

…I’ll remember the suffering Your love put You through,

And I will go through the valley if You want me to…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtNzOpKvPfw

KJV – King James Version of The Holy Bible

Poem – Contrast of Worlds—Confusing – Written 10/17/09 Angie Bennett Prince

Those Nail-Scarred Hands

Those Nail-Scarred Hands

@AngiePrince Hey, sweet Angie! May your heart be held tenderly in those nail-scarred hands to bring you comfort and peace.

Love ya!

I received the above "tweet" from another "Twitter Sister" Lynn Mosher yesterday that touched my heart deeply, and left me in a tender pile, weeping...

So later in the evening, I read her post from her blog, "Heading Home," and it too touched my heart deeply, stopping me in my tracks. So I asked and received Lynn's gracious permission to include her post here for you! You can find her blog at http://lynnmosher.blogspot.com/

Lynn Mosher's Blog post from yesterday along with my response to her:

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Not a Day for Words

Today is one of those days. You know. You’ve had them. Your heart is aching because life aimed its fiery darts at your heart and set it on fire and you need to hear some precious words of comfort from the Lord.

Maybe you tossed all night, kicking off the hot covers, turning over the tear-stained pillow a thousand times, hearing nothing but the beat of your own heart.

Maybe you watched for the first glint of dawn, as the clock seduced you to check it every fifteen minutes.

Maybe the words you need to hear are not for yourself but for someone you love dearly who is hurting, deeply hurting.

You yell out, “Lord, where are You?”

Then comes this whisper from the Still Small Voice…

“Today is not a day for many words. Just believe and sit quietly before Me. Open your heart and be aware of My Presence.”

After that, no more words. Nada. Zilch. Zippity-do-dah!

But then, verses bubble up from within…

*“Be still, and know…” (Ps. 46:10 NKJV)

*“But He answered her not a word.” (Matt. 15:23 NKJV)

*“She came and, kneeling, worshiped Him and kept praying.” (Matt. 15:25 Amp)

*“And behold, a woman…stood at His feet behind Him weeping; and she began to wash His feet with her tears, and wiped them with the hair of her head; and she kissed His feet and anointed them with the fragrant oil.” (Luke 7:37-38 NKJV)

How often do we sit at the feet of our Lord just to feel His nearness, His heartbeat, His love? How often do we seek a handout rather than to hold His hand? Do we open our hearts and pour out upon Him that precious perfume of our love…without saying a word?

David wrote, “What a blessing is that stillness as He brings them safely into harbor!” (Ps. 107:30 TLB) When you experience His stillness, may it be a soft resonance within you as harmony, safety, and peace.

Oh, Lord, when in the blackest hours of my pain, when adversity attempts to overwhelm me, and there is no word from You, I will believe You are still near. I will believe You linger by my side, though unnoticed, holding my hand, though not felt. I will believe You gently wipe away all my tears. I will believe You lovingly hold my heart in Your nail-scarred hands. I will believe You soothe all my hurts. Lord, may I sit adoringly at Your feet to seek Your Presence rather than Your hand, to seek Your heartbeat rather than Your words. Amen!

My Response:

Grieving Mother/Therapist, Angie Bennett Prince said...

Dearest Lynn,

Tears. Truth. Your words penetrate my heart and all my self-centered prayers. Such a tender Savior; instead of celebrating Him, I allow myself to get caught up in "the worries of this life" that can snuff out the sweetness, the tenderness, and yes, the still, small voice of our Beloved.

Thank you for your tender soul that points me back to what is most important, to what I could so easily miss by allowing the uproar of my demands to drown out the sweetness of His love . . . His sacrificial love that called Him to give His very life for me! How could I be so blinded, deafened by my own neediness when He stands there quietly . . . ready to give me His all . . . indeed, He already has.

Thank you so much, sweet sister, for leading me back into His arms where I feel no needs, no demands, and find . . . His love . . . is enough. It is everything. I weep. In His arms. Engulfed in His love. Humbled, thankful for His forgiveness. Finding what I needed all along... for He IS love!

He leads me back to verses He showed me earlier this week:

Psalm 46: God is our refuge & strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. Selah (translating-via Wikipedia- Selah = "Stop and listen").

(And how can we not fear with the very earth caving in?) . . . Because "The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress....Be still, and know that I am God....The Lord Almighty is WITH us; the God of Jacob IS our fortress."

Thank you dear sweet sister for helping me to "stop and listen," "to be still and know," to remember "He is WITH us!"

So thankful for you, I love you dear sister!

Angie

8/26/09 12:52 AM

I will rest now . . . in those nail-scarred hands,

In Honor Of

Another "Twitter Sister"

Who Ministers to My Heart!

Lynn Mosher

http://lynnmosher.blogspot.com/

http://lynnmosher.blogspot.com/2009/08/not-day-for-words.html#ixzz0PGIJyFLk

NailScarredHandshttp://th01.deviantart.com/fs5/300W/i/2004/320/8/c/Crucifixion_of_Jesus_by_morgue_princess.jpg

Fragile Flower

Fragile Flower

I looked at the mandevilla tonight,

And I saw three dainty pink blossoms there;

Although a marvelous thrill to my sight,

Beauteous blossoms proved more than I could bear...

The beauty of God pierced through to my soul;

The Creator God in all His finesse,

Created with care . . . but sin takes its toll . . .

My tears would soon water the flow’rs pink dress.

“My world was perfect, Miss Mandevilla,

Tied in a bow like your pretty blossom;

Now my world weeps like the weeping willow

Midst God’s world, still filled with beauty awesome.”

Each time I looked at each dainty pink flow’r

Radiating beauty, its only duty,

The tears again would quickly overpow’r,

Flooding mem’ries of my sweet baby’s beauty . . .

Lord, You’re so present in Your creation;

Each flower petal bears Your fingerprint!

Yet Satan’s presence in the equation

Will destroy it all . . . in devastation . . . ?!

Once I was strong, but now I’m rendered weak,

So strong: husband and children all ‘round me,

All full of Your love, Your will we did seek—

. . . Now plundered, ravaged by the Enemy.

When I see th’ beauteous mandevilla, Lord,

I catch a glimpse of Heaven filled with You:

No sin, no decay, no devastation . . .

Just You—worshipped by saints—their reward:

To live daily within Your Heavenly view,

In robes washed white, restored to perfection.

But I—I’m still here Lord—dealing with death,

Grieving through each day, though I take life’s breath,

With glimpses of You, but living in hell . . .

How to live in vic’try? Would someone pray tell?

Meanwhile, You say, “My grace is sufficient,

For My pow’r is made perfect in weakness;

Ev’rywhere Satan makes you deficient,

Enables Me to shine . . . through your meekness . . .”

O Creator God, You’ll overpower

Satan’s destruction of each fragile flower . . .

You've already restored my baby girl!

. . . Grant me grace to live in this broken world. . .

Lord, may I be like each dainty pink flow’r,

Radiating (Your) Beauty, my only duty,

And when my tears quickly overpow’r,

Flood my memory with Your awesome beauty. . .

http://infogizmo.com/downhome/flowers1.html

Written 7/22/09 – Fragile Flower – Angie Bennett Prince