Tuesday's Trust - Heaven...Remains Closer Than We Know

Tuesday's Trust

Heaven...Remains Closer Than We Know...

Out beyond the silence of eternal night,

within the void of voiceless echoes,

between the folds of dark and light.

In somber streams of starlight.

In the waves of ebb and flow.

Heaven exceeds eternal planes.

Though, it remains closer then we know.

~John French

In John's words:

...Brandon passed away in August of 2009 from an undiagnosed heart condition. The devastation of that one single moment has crushed our view of reality and cast us down into a state of perpetual winter. I’ve been writing all my life, though not publically. Brandon’s death has so overwhelmed me that I can no longer contain my thoughts.

Although my stance is undermined by despair, and frosted by the bitterness that follows the loss of my son, I will labor to plant some seeds of promise in the barren future that I'm so unexpectedly tilling.

Perhaps something beneficial will stem from my mourning. If you can gather even a grain of hope from my reaping, it may help to sustain you through your own emotional storm.

~John French

Thank you to John French for another of his inspired poems.

Readers feel free to click "Comment" below and make a comment or share something about your own grief. I love my readers and would love to get to know you better. (If however, you prefer to just read and glean what you can quietly in your grief, that is perfectly fine too. We care about you in your quiet grief as well! Trust me, I am there quite often.)

John French: http://bit.ly/aUItcb

Friday's Faith - Run, Baby, Run!

Friday's Faith

Run, Baby, Run!

My runner girl, fastest in the county,

Was All-Knoxville-Interscholastic League,

And third across the state of Tennessee.

You run with such speed, such grace, and such ease

Like a deer’s beautiful, strong legs would flee.

Run, baby, run; your face lights up with glee!

My heart’s delight, my precious baby girl,

You’ve now been called to leave this earthly world—

Open arms, your Heav’nly Father greets you;

Run, baby, run to Him who so loves you!

Mommy is grieving the loss of you here;

My heart is breaking as I shed each tear,

But I trust by faith, your God holds you near,

His little lamb Home, Heaven fills with cheer,

And you now run with Him, free as a deer.

Run, baby, run to God who draws you near!

⁶ As for me, my life has already been poured out as an offering to God. The time of my death is near. ⁷ I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. ⁸ And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing. 2 Timothy 4:6-8

Poem - Run, Baby, Run - Angie Bennett Prince - September 5, 2008

Music in Grief - "Like a Cleansing Deep in My Soul"

Re: Comments -- Music
One of you, after reading my first post on this blog, made the following comment:

I also find I weep the hardest when I hear good gospel music, and it's like a cleansing deep in my soul.

(Digger)

Thank you for sharing what helps you to best express your grief! What is it about Music? It just seems to penetrate right into our hearts and souls! Some say music is the “language of the emotions.” I agree with you Digger; good music surely speeds up the grief process for me; it just cuts through any “intellectualizing” I might be doing to try to explain away my grief, for the music brings it right out of me in such a poignant way—painful, yes, but tender, too.

Speaking of music that helps us to express our grief, I added this music bar in the sidebar to the left (and two others at the bottom of the page) to share some of the songs that have been so meaningful to me and my family members; some were even ones Merry Katherine gave to me, or loved herself. (One of my favorite memories of her is hearing her belt out “My Redeemer” in her bedroom with Nicole turned up many decibels! So sweet to see her heart pouring out to God like that!)

--See the music widget at the bottom of the blog to get the full rendition of Nicole Mullen's song, "Redeemer."--

I would love to hear more comments from you all! (To comment, just click on "Comment" that is just underneath each post in the blog, and then type in your comment.) Perhaps you could share some music that has been especially helpful to you in grief. (The two music widgets at the bottom should allow you to even play some of your own favorite music while you peruse the blog. But let us know in your comment what some of those songs are!)

Thank you for your comments! I will discuss some others in a blog, coming up soon!

Writing "The Stone" out of my Anguish

The poem, “The Stone,” was written out of my terrible anguish and confusion; I wrote it before I could set foot into that funeral home to decide what we “wanted” to put on Merry Katherine's gravestone. We were literally about to walk out the door when I just had to stop, sit down and write first. I absolutely knew I could not go there until I met with God first to process through some of my torment.

He knew the funeral home was the last place I wanted to go on behalf of my vital, lively, ever-active nineteen-year-old, and He so tenderly gifted me with that poem. Then we were able to go and complete that task—not an easy one, but with much more peace in my heart to be able to tackle it anyway. God is so merciful; He meets me in my heartache and pain, restoring an eternal perspective, and then, He wraps His arms around me and comforts me.

The Stone

Angie Bennett Prince July, 2007

We go today to plan your stone.
We don't want to go there--it chills us to the bone.
We miss you and want you here;
We think of you and shed more tears.

The funeral home wonders where we've been;
Eleven months now--will our hearts ever mend?
I tried to explain the difficulty one day on the phone:
The last thing we ever wanted to happen--
We now have to carve in stone?!

So we go there today in God's strength alone
To carve your precious name upon that stone
Only because we know for you death is not the end;
On that fateful day, your life in Heaven did just begin!

And since for your sins and ours Christ did atone,
We know we will join you in Heaven
To worship our Lord around His throne.
Because some day, just as He did for Jesus
When the disciples thought He was gone,
For those of us who know Him, and by Him are known,
God--in His resurrection power--will come down
Himself to earth again to roll back all the stones!


Be sure to listen to "Then Came the Morning" (see the sidebar to the left) before or after reading my poem!

God's Comfort in the Midst of Raw Grief . . .

Last night was hard. My husband and I were listening to music; I was writing a poem about my baby. When we heard Vince Gill's "Go Rest High On that Mountain" (see words below; this song is one of our favorites as it so aptly describes our baby's dilemma), our grief went back to square one. My husband said he cried as hard as he did that first day . . . So did I.

God continues to be SO sweet to meet us in our grief: "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." . . .

So then we immediately heard Dottie Rambo's "Sheltered in the Arms of God" - from Bill and Gloria Gaither's "Reunion-Precious Memories" (see words below); it was like our baby wanted to remind us- that's where I am now -- sheltered safely in the arms of God!

Go Rest High On that Mountain (Vince Gill) [You can view and hear Vince singing this beautifully inspired song he wrote at the time of his brother's death on the sidebar YouTube to the left of this page; it has meant so much to us as well!]

I know your life on earth was troubled, And only you could know the pain. You weren't afraid to face the devil, Were no stranger to the rain.

Go rest high on that mountain; Son you work on earth is done. Go to Heaven a-shoutin' - Love for the Father and the Son.

Oh, how we cried the day you left us, Gathered round your grave to grieve. Wish I could see the angels' faces When they hear your sweet voice sing.

Go rest high on that mountain; Son, your work on earth is done. Go to Heaven a-shoutin' - Love for the Father and the Son. Go to heaven a-shoutin' - Love for the Father and the Son.

Sheltered in the Arms of God (Dottie Rambo)

I feel the touch of hands so kind and tender, They're leading me in paths that I must trod; I'll have no fear 'cause Jesus walks beside me, And I'm sheltered in the arms of God. So let the storms rage high, the dark clouds rise, They won't worry me for I'm sheltered safe within the arms of God; He walks with me and naught of Earth shall harm me, For I'm sheltered in the arms of God.

Soon I shall hear the call from Heaven's portals, Come on home my child, it's the last mile you have to trod; I'll fall asleep and I'll wake up in God's new Heaven, sheltered safe within the arms of God. So let the storms rage high, the dark clouds rise, They won't worry me for I'm sheltered safe within the arms of God; He walks with me and naught of Earth shall harm me, For I'm sheltered in the arms of God.

Soon I shall hear the call from Heaven's portals, Come on home my child, it's the last mile you have to trod; I'll fall asleep and I'll wake up in God's new Heaven, sheltered safe within the arms of God. So let the storms rage high, the dark clouds rise, They don't worry me for I'm sheltered safe within the arms of God; He walks with me and naught of Earth shall harm me, For I'm sheltered in the arms of God.

So let the storms rage high, the dark clouds rise, They don't worry me for I'm sheltered safe within the arms of God; He walks with me and naught of Earth shall harm me, For I'm sheltered safe in the arms of God.

Then Bill Gaither had his folks sing my daddy's favorite hymn, "I Come to the Garden Alone" after Dottie Rambo's song:

And He walks with me and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, And the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known!

I could just picture her sheltered in God's loving arms, and walking and talking with Him as He loves and comforts her. God is so sweet, so gentle, ever reminding us she's now safely carried in His arms.

Parents Losing a Teenager to Death - A Glimpse of Grief After Two and a Half Years

“I not only live each endless day in grief, but live each day thinking about living each day in grief.” C. S. Lewis ...

My husband and I have been grieving now for two and a half years. Grief is so painful! I have to continually get in touch (emotionally, mentally, and spiritually) with my grief to get it "exhumed" from the inside to come to the consciousness and be expressed out so that it doesn't just build up (to later come out when I least expect it or to get expressed inappropriately). [I have a counseling practice, so I have to keep my grief flowing for this reason as well, or any unresolved "counter-transference" might affect my clients negatively.]

Grief without rest doesn't mix well. Grieving is exhausting work--I'm facing the deepest loss possible--every parent's worst nightmare--so it is not easy to do; it therefore takes a toll on my body physically. But rest, eating well, taking vitamins, exercising (which I am now starting to do a little more of), and anti-depressants if necessary, are crucial to supporting my over-stressed system. Talking to a safe person about my grief is also critical; for me, my safe person is my husband--he is very tender, patient, and accepting plus he knows the grief as well; he is going through his own! We try to support one another which works fairly well (until our timing collides, and we're both down at the same times. Those are times when it's especially important to have a close relationship with our Heavenly Father!)

Which brings me to--what helps me THE most in processing my grief--is the continuous presence of my Heavenly Father who is carrying me through this grief on a daily, moment-by-moment basis. One tool He has given me as I walk through my grief is to continually write out my grief -- in prayers to Him, poetry, essays, etc. The pain is there, but it is poignant in the writing, and then God's Holy Spirit comes into the process to bring His perspective and His comfort -- and His challenging my faulty thinking when appropriate!-- and there is a relief after the intense outpouring of hurt, pain, questions, confusion, etc. Over time, you can see the healing as you are writing, plus, the former writings continue to be a therapeutic tool to review and grieve through as necessary! I tell people, yes God is IN the grief; God is not an anesthetic to numb the grief--the pain is still there-- but He meets me IN the grief, and walks through it WITH me.

May God bless you in your grief, or in your concern for a beloved griever.